John works all the time and Marsha does not feel that he is around the family often enough. Marsha spends most of her time taking care of the children and John feels that she does not spend enough time with him. Can this relationship be saved? Should it be saved? Here is how to save a relationship.
First of all, the two of you must decide together if you believe that the relationship is worth salvaging. If you are both willing to put in the work, then most any relationship can be saved. However, if one of the persons involved just gives up and no longer wants to try, then the relationship is probably doomed.
Couples often remain in a relationship that is failing because of sheer convenience or for their children’s best interest. Now, these are important reasons-especially making sure that the kids are in the best environment possible. However, these reasons alone are many times not enough. How to save a relationship begins with each person becoming strongly committed to making the relationship work.
The next thing that needs to be done is to figure out what the real problems are inside the relationship. Many people go wrong with trying to learn how to save a relationship because they have the mistaken belief that a symptom of a problem is the actual problem itself.
An example of this is a couple that is no longer truly intimate together. To fill that void, one or both may seek to get the need for intimacy met by someone else. Now, this behavior is just a symptom, and will most likely continue unless the underlying problem of no true intimacy in the relationship is dealt with.
After you have diagnosed the core issues, you can begin to share your thoughts and feelings. By this I mean both verbalizing your own feelings and listening to the concerns of your partner.
After identifying in great detail the main problems that are tearing the relationship apart, work together on a plan to get these problems resolved. Once that’s done, act immediately toward implementing your plan.
An example of this would be if you both decide that one of your core issues is not seeing each other very often. If this is the case, then come up with a plan to go out together one night a week and do something special and memorable to rekindle the relationship. Then, make sure to actually DO this every week without fail.
Lastly, keep in mind that how to save a relationship is always a work in progress. EVERY relationship has its problems, no matter how long the couple has been together. Have a loving and forgiving attitude toward your partner and you will have far better odds of a successful, long-term relationship.
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