Cum Like a Porn Star: How to Shoot a Powerful Load Every Time

You’ve seen it in porn, but probably question if it’s even possible. Can someone actually cum like that? Yep. Here’s how to cum like a porn star.

Let’s be honest, probably 99% of us have watched porn for enjoyment. I personally can’t watch porn because I lose interest, but I know many people who live by it. But, besides that, I’ve watched a couple porn videos where the man and woman are both cumming like there’s no tomorrow, and frankly, I was impressed.

But, of course, after watching that, I became curious. Are porn stars the only ones who can do that? Do they have some special gift that we, non-porn stars don’t have?

How to cum like a porn star – 11 tips that work

Anyone can cum like a porn star, you just have to work on it. And if you’re already masturbating regularly, I mean, why not work towards making your sperm as strong as possible? I mean, it’s a pretty nice boost to the ego, am I right?

Now it’s your turn to cum like a porn star. Here are some tips.

#1 Hydrate. The amount of water you drink daily is actually linked to the amount of semen that’s released when you orgasm. Why? Because semen is water-based, and that’s what help push the sperm out.

So, make sure you increase your water intake, and you’ll notice that you’ll be able to increase your ejaculate and cum like a porn star. Be careful with alcohol because it dehydrates your body, so your sperm won’t be as strong after hitting up the bar. In some cases that may be a good thing…  [Read: What do women really think about your penis?]

#2 You don’t always have to masturbate. You’re young, you’re sexual, so it’s normal that you enjoy masturbating daily. However, if you masturbate every day, you lose a solid chunk of your sperm. So, by abstaining from masturbating or having sex, you’ll increase your count.

Try not touching yourself for a day or two, and you’ll notice how big your load will be after. It’s just two days, you’re not going to die.

#3 Exercise. I’ll talk later about the importance of kegel exercises, however, aside from Kegels, you also need to work on the rest of your body. Men who are physically active have a higher sperm count than non-active men.

Why? Because physical activity increases testosterone which… drum roll please… increases your sperm levels. You don’t need to look like Arnold, but lifting weights a couple times a week doesn’t hurt. [Read: 20 moves to last longer during sex without any difficulty]

#4 Stay away from heat. I know you love your hot tub, but that thing ain’t helping you out one bit. Stay away from heat. I’m not saying to never use a hot tub or sauna, but don’t be excessive. Also, if you can, try to sleep naked so that you have a solid airflow going on. If you can avoid making your testicles warm, then do so.

#5 Cut back on the booze. If you hit the pub up after work and have a couple beers, that’s okay. However, you should know that because alcohol affects your liver function, as a result, it increases your estrogen levels. Now, everyone has estrogen in their body, both men and women.

However, if you’re a man, you want more testosterone. Try to limit your alcohol consumption and you’ll see an increase in your libido and sperm load. [Read: 12 amazing facts you didn’t know about semen]

#6 Supplement support. You need to be giving your body the proper nutrients in order to increase your sperm count. Try supplements which are high in antioxidants, folic acid, zinc, and vitamins B12 and C. These are the key supplements which are essential for your sperm. You want them to be strong shooters, right? Then you’ll have to support them.

#7 Practice those kegel exercises. You need to exercise your PC muscle. Your PC *pubococcygeus* muscle is crucial in your sex life. You should be practicing kegel exercises which prevent premature ejaculation, increase sperm, prolong your orgasm and keep your prostate healthy.

So, take a couple minutes out of your day, maybe while you’re watching TV, and do your kegel exercises. You’ll notice a difference when you cum. [Read: Kegel exercises and why both men and women should do it]

#8 Say no to briefs. Mark Wahlberg looked hot in his Calvins, however, those were pretty tight. Sure, they’re sexy, but they’re squishing your testes and increasing the temperature. You don’t want it to be hot down there. Why? Heat kills sperm. So, keep a nice air flow going on in your pants and you’ll keep your sperm and semen levels high.

#9 Pay attention to what you’re eating. I know you like eating McDonald’s, but it’s really not doing you any good. First, it’s unhealthy. And second, your sperm is being affected by your poor food choices. Sticking with a clean diet will fill your sperm with the antioxidants they need to shoot right out.

You should be eating more foods such as prunes, apples, artichokes, and berries if you want to be able to cum more. [Read: The many tastes of cum – Straight from women’s mouths]

#10 Quit the smoking. If your mother nagging you wasn’t enough to get you to stop smoking, well, the fact that it affects your sperm should do the trick. Men who smoke usually have a decreased sperm count in comparison to non-smoking men. Why? Because it disturbs the balance of the proteins in your testes. You want these proteins balanced for healthy and strong sperm. [Read: 18 perks and perils of dating a male porn star]

#11 Stress management. If you’re stressed out, you may find it difficult even to become aroused, which makes sense because you’re body functions as one. Interestingly enough, if you’re stressed, your hormones are affected, which interferes with the way your body produces testosterone.

If you don’t know what testosterone is, well, it’s a big player in sperm production. If you’re not producing the needed levels of testosterone, you won’t be able to increase your load.

[Read: 25 common porn myths almost all people still believe]

And you thought there was a quick and easy way to get yourself to cum like a porn star. Nuh uh, sorry, but it’s a lifestyle change. Good luck!

The post Cum Like a Porn Star: How to Shoot a Powerful Load Every Time is the original content of LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Article from: LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships, by Natasha Ivanovic

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Benefits of Using an Online Senior Dating Site to Meet Senior Singles

A lot of seniors are intimidated by the idea of getting back to the dating scene. Luckily, the ease of online senior dating websites can make it far easier for you to find the perfect person for you.

A site devoted to helping senior singles meet other people is a great place to start. You already know that the best part of other members on the site are lively seniors looking to rejoin the dating scene and meet someone special.

You also have the benefit of reading through as many online descriptions as you want before you decide to get in touch with anyone at all. You can search for seniors who have similar interests to you, or you may simply look for people who live within the same zone.

Once you’ve joined a site for senior singles, you should also take some time to create your own profile. This is definitively the most significant step and should be treated as such. Remember to include a photo of yourself that shows you at your greatest. Don’t be too hard on yourself about your image. Remember that other people will see you in a different way and you might be the ideal person for another senior single out there looking for someone just like you.

The convenience of online senior dating can save you time and money. Picture trying to find the right companion for you by simply meeting one person at a time at a restaurant or caf, spending an hour making small-talk to see if you’re well-matched or not.

In that same amount of time, you could have browsed possibly hundreds of senior personals and online descriptions and narrowed down your options. You have a much greater chance of finding matching people by using a senior dating site. Not only a much bigger chance, but also saving time and energies and doing it from the comfort of your home!

If you are really serious and want to meet seniors online I do suggest you take some time to read resources about senior online dating

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25 Signs Your Heart Is Breaking *and How to Get Over It*

It can be horrible to feel as though your heart is breaking. Here are the signs that suggest you are nursing a broken heart—and how to fix it.

Everyone goes through heartbreak at some point in their lives. At the time, it feels like the very worst thing in the world. The signs of a broken heart are both physical and mental, and some of them really take you by surprise. Knowing your heart is breaking is the first step you need to take in order to mend it again.

The signs your heart is breaking

Let’s look at the signs that indicate your heart is breaking, and how you can start to make things better once more.

#1 You can’t stop crying. We’ve all been there. From the moment you wake up, to the moment you go to sleep you can’t stop crying. Every time you think you are about to regain control, something else sets you off again. Crying is a totally normal part of heartbreak and is a good way of letting the hurt and pain out. [Read: The 7 stages of heartbreak when you become someone’s ex]

#2 Your chest hurts. Often people who suffer heartbreak feel as though someone is sitting on their chest, or they get sharp chest pains where their heart is located. This can be very scary. It’s usually just the emotional stress and nothing to worry about.

#3 You can’t sleep. Lying awake at night thinking about the person who broke your heart. And the constant replay of your breakup or last conversations to the point where you simply cannot get to sleep is a common sign your heart is breaking. Being tired makes us feel more emotional too.

#4 You can’t eat. Going off food when going through a breakup is very common. Lots of people tend to lose weight with the stress and upset of it all.

#5 You feel breathless. Often people suffering from heartbreak get so worked up they feel as though they can’t catch their breath. This can be another sign that feels quite worrying, but it will go away once you start to feel better again. [Read: Can you die from a broken heart? 15 answers you didn’t expect]

#6 You get distracted easily. Can’t seem to concentrate? If your mind keeps wandering and you can’t focus because of all the thoughts racing around your head, this is due to your heartbreak.

#7 You forget what you are saying. You start a sentence and then just totally trail off? This again is simply because you’re thinking so many thoughts and feeling such a rollercoaster of emotions that it is hard to keep your mouth up with your brain!

#8 You can’t get that person out of your mind. If you feel your heart is breaking, it is no surprise that most of your thoughts fixate on the person who caused you so much pain. Slowly but surely, you’ll stop thinking about them so much and find that longer and longer periods of time pass when you don’t think about them at all. [Read: How to get over someone when your heart does not want to]

#9 You constantly try to figure out what went wrong. Mulling over all the details of your past relationship is totally normal. You’ll pick apart every sentence, every word, trying to figure out exactly what went wrong.

#10 You blame yourself. When feeling heartbroken and upset, it is easy to start losing self-confidence and blaming yourself for the breakup. Try to remember that relationships rarely fail just because of one person’s actions. Besides blaming yourself isn’t going to help anyone.

#11 It’s all you talk about. If you’ve got to that point where your friends start to roll their eyes every time you bring up you-know-who, it might be time to make an effort to talk about something else. It’s hard when you are heartbroken, but sometime you have to move on. [Read: How to move on and deal with a break up with a smile]

#12 You feel dizzy. Another physical sign of heartbreak is feeling dizzy. If you have a little wobble from time to time, this again is probably just the stress.

#13 You feel faint. Feeling like you may faint can be super scary, but if it’s because of heartbreak it shouldn’t be anything to worry about. Just make sure you have eaten enough, even if it’s hard. Drink plenty of water and go easy on yourself!

#14 You comfort eat. While some people go off their food, comfort eating can be another classic sign of heartbreak! Carton of ice cream anyone?

#15 You have panic attacks. Panic attacks encompass many of the physical symptoms discussed above and many more. Panic attacks are super common when feeling stressed out, so if you experience them try to figure out what your triggers are and take up gentle exercise, meditation, and try and eat healthy. Stay away from the booze too!

#16 You feel sick. Feeling sick is another common side effect when your heart is breaking. This again is to do with the emotional stress, and it will pass when your heart starts to heal. [Read: The pity playlist: 10 songs to help heal your broken heart]

Some tips for the broken hearted

#1 Give it time. Well this one might be obvious, but the absolute best thing for a broken heart is time. The more time that passes, the less pain you’ll feel. Soon you might even wonder what all the fuss was about in the first place!

#2 Hang out with friends. Distract yourself by surrounding yourself with all your best friends—they’ll look after you no matter what.

#3 Get rid of memories. Hanging onto those keepsakes, messages, and photos is only going to make it harder. Be brave, have a clearing out of all those memories. You’ll feel so much more ready to move on.

#4 Focus on yourself. Take time to step back and really think about how you are doing. Make time for yourself, spoil yourself, and above all be kind to yourself. The more you love yourself the better you’ll feel. [Read: Life’s a bitch: 17 feel good ways to make yourself feel better]

#5 Get fit. There is nothing like hitting the gym to get those endorphins flowing and putting you in a positive mindset, so what are you waiting for?!

#6 Do things that you always wanted to do. Don’t let anything hold you back anymore. Now is your time to do the things you have always wanted to do. You’ve got no one to answer to but yourself. How awesome is that?

#7 Do things that scare you. Step outside your comfort zone and challenge yourself. You’ll be surprised at how amazing you feel, and how proud you’ll feel too.

#8 Succeed. Make some goals and then go for them hell for leather. Once you achieve them you’ll realize the person who broke your heart was the one stopping you from standing on top of the world. [Read: How to live in the moment: 20 positive ways to live in the now]

#9 Meet someone else. When you are back to your confident, butt-kicking best, get out there and find that special someone who knows how to treat you right and make you happier than ever!

[Read: 15 best feel good movies for the brokenhearted]

Nursing a broken heart truly feels like the worst time in your life, but remember, it is incredibly rare to not to get over it. If you suffer from any signs your heart is breaking, try to focus on how to heal a breaking heart and, with time, soon you’ll start to feel better—I promise!

The post 25 Signs Your Heart Is Breaking *and How to Get Over It* is the original content of LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.
Article from: LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships, by Bethany Cadman

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Some Good Online Dating Tips for Women

As a woman, when looking for free online dating tips you should always look for online dating tips that make sense. It can be difficult to find good online dating tips for women, but if you look hard enough you should be able to find some practical online dating tips for women that can help you avoid trouble. Avoiding potential trouble from predators that use the internet as their hunting ground, are the primary online dating tips geared toward women.

But there are other things to watch out for when using online dating services and important things to remember as you use their service.Several reputable online dating services take complaints about their clients very seriously as they try and do a good job of screening out potential criminals.

So, one of the first online dating tips for women that can be given is not only something that will help you, but also others that use the online dating service.To help protect future clients, always report shady characters to the online dating service so that the website can take the appropriate actions.

Taking everything very slow is of all the online dating tips for women the best piece of advice. You run the risk of becoming the victim of a predator if you give out too much information or become too comfortable with someone you meet on an internet dating service.

If someone has a real interest in you as a person and not as a victim then it is perfectly fine to take your time and get to know that person as well as you need to before you open up to them with other personal information. It is up to you as to what that pace is, but the best online dating tips for women all have to do with taking your time and getting to know the person before you open up to them too much.

Before You Meet Them Google it

There are a great many male criminals and predators out there using internet dating services and women should be especially careful when using online dating services. Put a prospective date’s name through an online search before you agree to a date, which is a very basic online dating tip for women that many women seem to forget. When you send someone’s name through an internet search You would be shocked at what you can come up with. Before you agree to that first meeting, make sure to protect yourself and find out as much as you can about your prospective date.

If You’re A Women Thinking About Online Dating, Check Out This Excellent No Cost Article, Some Good Online Dating Tips for Women Before You Start. To Browse More Articles On Dating Tips Visit, http://ift.tt/2nbJEbu.

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Are Your Friends Hurting Your Relationship?

You exist within a web of relationships. For instance, if your friend is going through tough times, you may find yourself feeling an emotional heaviness throughout the day, thinking and worrying about your friend. As this colors your mood, your partner may start to notice that lately you’ve been preoccupied and down. Since emotions are contagious, this will impact your partner in some way and her/his interactions with others may now be different as a result of what your friend shared with you.

How is this relevant to your marriage or relationship?

Your relationship exists within a larger social context, and your friends, coworkers, family, and even the society in which you live can directly or indirectly impact your relationship. Think of your relationship as one link on a never-ending chain of connectedness.

This was evident with two couples I recently coached:

A brief story of relationship isolation:

Tad and Wanda have lived together for a little over a year and during a recent coaching session, Wanda complained that “all of our friends seem to be getting divorced or breaking up. It’s depressing and makes me think there’s something wrong with me for trying to make my relationship work. When I try to talk to my friends about a fight I had with Tad, they just tell me to ‘find someone better-suited to you,’ or ‘relationships are overrated anyway.’ The whole ‘there are lots of fish in the sea’ mindset isn’t helpful when I’m trying to make my relationship work now.”

Tad and Wanda lack the couple-to-couple support that is vital for a sustainable, long-term relationship. They both struggle with feeling like the “oddball couple” in a sea of failed relationships (and they don’t have any single friends who are pro-relationship)–and both acknowledged that this was starting to negatively impact their union.

A brief story of marital support:

Molly and Jeff have been together for eleven years. Both are retired and have been active participants in their local community and volunteer for numerous causes. This involvement has offered them opportunities to develop friendships and socialize with other couples.

Molly joked that their friends “saved our marriage on at least two occasions” because of the support they offered Molly. She shared, “If Jeff and I are going through a difficult time, for whatever reason, I don’t feel alone. I have at least two other women I can talk to who have been through difficult times but they’re still happily married–I know I’m not alone in my struggles and that makes a world of difference. And I have a few single friends who are supportive of my relationship and committed relationships in general, even though they’re not in one now. All that encouragement among my friends really helps whenever I start to worry that the challenges of a romantic relationship might be too much for me.”

The need for relationship support

Couples love to hear about other couples who have successful relationships. Have you ever noticed how people in relationships are happy to learn that a famous couple is in it for the long haul? Many couples feel validated to discover that their favorite movie star or musician has resisted the temptations that come with fame and are committed to one person. Notice your reaction the next time you hear that people you know and/or admire are splitting up.

Couples root for other couples–there is an unspoken, cosmic connection, a sense that we’re in this together. If Brad and Angelina can make their relationship work, and your neighbors and friends can make their relationships work, you end up feeling more hopeful that you can make your own work.

Seek Out Relationship Support

Relationship support comes in many forms and the first step is to look in your own backyard. Make a list of all the individuals and couples you know and admire: family, friends, teachers, community leaders, local organizations or church members.

You might be surprised to learn that there are people in your life that have been married or together for a long time (and feel lucky to be with the same person). These couples can be an emotional resource for you and your partner. Would you consider asking them about their relationship, especially what has worked for them? Are you willing to seek their support when you (or your partner) need advice or guidance?

We all need relationship mentors–couples who have successfully navigated the complicated interpersonal terrain that comes with committed relationships. This doesn’t mean you should overlook friends not currently in relationships as potential sources of support. Often single friends who understand and celebrate you and your relationship can be a safe place to go to when you need a different perspective or just need to vent.

Don’t overlook the vast relationship wisdom that surrounds you.

Many couples like spending time with other couples. If most of your friends seem to be in dire relationship straits or your friends’ values regarding commitment differ from your own, you need to expand your social network–seek out couples you and your partner can socialize with, couples dedicated to making their own relationships work. The goal of expanding your couples-support-system doesn’t mean you have to abandon your current friends because they aren’t in a relationship or their relationship is in trouble–it means that you enrich your circle of friends to include those that believe in the benefit of a long-term, committed relationship and will help support you in yours.

It might seem like a paradox that you can be with someone you deeply love, yet still feel isolated. Often couples assume feeling isolated means there is something wrong with their relationship–while this can be an indication that there are problems that need to be addressed, it can also be an indication that your relationship is surrounded by negativity and a lack of support.

No matter how strong your relationship might seem, you and your partner do not exist in a vacuum. When you establish the goal of building a support network for your relationship, you have taken an important step in buffering the damaging effects of relationship-isolation.

Is your relationship worth protecting? Are you ready to make your marriage everything it can be?

To discover more relationship tips, visit http://ift.tt/2mxDW2j and sign up for Dr. Nicastro’s FREE Relationship Toolbox Newsletter.

As a bonus, you will receive two free reports.

Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. is a relationship and intimacy coach.

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Drawing The Lines On Parental Interference

Of all the relationships we form in our lives, the one with our parents is the most complex. It is the longest, and it can be at various times easy, joyful, difficult, or infuriating.

The great problem is that in those first few years in which your parents nourish and protect you, and the next fifteen or so when they support, encourage, and try to guide you, they come to see you as part of them, as a young boy who is dependent on them for protection and love. Your growth into a man of independent means, emotions, thoughts, ideas, beliefs, and relationships is acknowledged in word and somewhat in spirit, but is rarely, if ever, deeply felt.

This often leads to trouble when you enter college and even afterward. Parental interference with your life—or, indeed, the life you’re trying to make—can be a source of tension and distress. It is especially hard when you are just starting out because in many ways you will need their support. You will need financial help getting through college, and you may even need a place to stay after graduating. It is not unknown for well-established bachelor professionals to move back home as a means of saving money while they prepare to launch a new business or some other venture.

The point is you do not, for both personal and practical reasons, want to be constantly at odds with your folks. However, you will, for the aforementioned reasons, need to insist on boundaries—on strict lines across which they must not step.

The spheres of your life in which you insist on having your own way are of course up to you. It may be the women you choose to date, where you choose to live, how much you choose to go into debt, or your views on religion. Most parents would prefer you to follow their advice in these rather sensitive and important areas. But you must do as your mind, heart, and conscience dictates.

So, how do you draw the lines on parental interference?

Any given difficulty can be resolved much more smoothly if you do not conform to childish behavior. If you do not act like a brat, it will be much harder for them to treat you like one. It will require all the patience you can muster, but you must avoid charged, emotional responses when they question your judgment. Take a deep breath and give them your reasons for thinking and feeling the way you do. Speak to them as a rational, mature adult and they will start to see and treat you as one.

Drawing lines is always harder when you are under their roof. If you need to tell them something that you know will be hard for them to hear, do it away from the family home. Have the conversation in a public place or in your home or apartment. Neutral ground or your ground will produce a feeling of equality between you, which will in turn help gain their respect for your decision.

Finally, show them that you have taken their advice seriously; that you are not rejecting it in a spirit of irrational rebelliousness. There is also something to be said for not being flaky. Flip flopping and indecision are signs that you really don’t know your own mind or what you want. Such indecisiveness will only invite more attempts by your parent to interfere with your life.

You have no desire to make mom cry and throw dad into a fit of rage. There will be times in which you will need to tell them to butt out of your affairs. But there is a way of doing this which does not leave hard feelings and a damaged relationship.

Article from: TSB Magazine | Dating and Lifestyle Advice for Men, by Christopher Reid

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Marriage: Is It Redundant Similar To Every Other Monogamous Relationship Or Something Else?

It’s so done and dusted that it almost seems like an age-old debate now. But, it isn’t. The question of whether it is to be, or not to be is very recent. And it came about with the rise of gender equality, freedom of sexuality and role reversals. A lot of millennials are questioning the institution altogether, while others are entering into holy matrimony for all the wrong reasons. Look around you and tell me if you haven’t seen couples get married only because they were too afraid to be alone; or because they thought they couldn’t do better or, simply put, kids and financial security.

© Unsplash

Off late, I’ve been having incredibly heated discussions about whether or not, marriage and monogamy are natural, let alone even legit anymore. And while I’ve never really been able to come up with a concrete response—mine always has more to do with the fact that it has more to do with feelings and levels of commitment than logic, honestly—I do feel, somewhere that marriage, as a concept and form of commitment is quite honestly, unlike any other. 

One might club monogamy and matrimony under the same umbrella; one might have their own reasons to do so and I’m not going to rubbish those reasons, entirely. But, I’m going to try and present cases in point for both sides of the topic. And let’s remember that all forms of commitments come with their own sets of disclaimers; marriage comes with a few more. But, there’s a reason why you should not write it off as redundant, just yet. 

Monogamy Vs Matrimony 

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There is this accepted perception that monogamy and marriage are interchangeable. The argument I get a lot is ‘you don’t have to be married to someone to be committed to them’, ‘Monogamous relationships are just as good as being married, ‘One does not need a label to spend the rest of their lives with someone’… The list goes on. However, as it would turn out, there is a HUGE difference between being married to somebody and being in a monogamous relationship with them. Marriage brings in legal, social, emotional and sexual repercussions. It’s about taking on societal and familial roles on an entirely new level. Sure, you can say that when you’re in a monogamous relationship, your significant other is just as involved in all of these spheres of your life. But, they would still be your “Partner”, as opposed to being your “Husband”, or “Wife”. 

And It Is About Labels 

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Believe it or not; like it or not; marriage is about labels. At the end of the day, you want to belong to someone and be more than just their significant other, partner, girlfriend, or boyfriend. You want the titles of husband, or wife to be added after your name. It’s not about the surname. But, it is about the roles and the titles because whether you want to accept it or not, the truth is, having a Mr, or a Mrs as a prefix makes a difference to the way we lived our lives before and after being married to someone. Aside from the fact that it feels like you do belong with someone, it is also about being responsible for that person when everyone else is gone—and yes, that will happen. It’s about having someone to fall back on, not because it’s a luxury; but because it’s now, a part of your life. It’s about letting someone hold you responsible for their well being and likewise, you them. It sounds selfish, yes. But, trust me, when you move beyond the face value of that sentence, it’s much more selfless and productive than you could fathom. 

It’s No Cakewalk 

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It’s true; it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. And most people would happily agree to it, too. It’s one of the most difficult decisions you’ll ever have to make in your life. You cannot expect to feel the same way for one person everyday; you cannot and will not feel the love for them throughout the day, for the rest of your life. But, then again, it’s not about loving so much as it’s about choosing. You’re willing to choose that same person over and over again, every single day, for the rest of your life. You will have to mentally prepare yourself for days when you probably do not want to be around that person; for the times when you’d rather just walk away from the useless banter than stand and take it; for moments when you’d rather just be alone in a room. But, you’d still choose to be with that person, no matter what or when or how because you have made JUST THAT sort of a commitment to them. You have decided to let this person take over your time and your emotions and almost every sphere of your life and it works the same way for you over them. 

It’s About Safeguards

© Unsplash

It’s about being so sure about one person being able to catch you when you fall; or being so sure about this person that if they told you to jump off a cliff, you could do it with your eyes closed, knowing well enough that it’s going to be okay. It takes time; it takes years; it takes patience. It takes decades of bickering, arguing and fighting till you’re both on the same side. It takes effort and losing the ego and a sense of where you’re headed to tell if you’re ready to spend the rest of your life with this one person. And sometimes, it’s not even about the entirety of your life—no one guarantees happy endings and the fairytales; not even storytellers—sometimes, it’s just about a lifetime in whatever little time you spend. It’s more than just “a piece of paper”. It’s a deal; it’s a partnership and it’s a promise to stick to one another and tie each other down because, sometimes, that’s the only way we can be free. 

Humans crave connection; they crave emotional bonds that last. So, yes, we doubt marriage more than often; but, we also doubt life, the good in this world, our politicians’ agendas and the future of this planet. We’re still doing what we must, aren’t we? We’re still building roads, homes and investing in a future when we might not even make it through the day. Isn’t it the same with marriage, only ten times more intense? 

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Marriage is not redundant. Our threshold for commitment is. We’re afraid of the unknown. We’re also afraid of the known. We’re afraid to put in effort for one person who could become our whole world. We like to claim that we’d instead just stay monogamous for the rest of our lives and that it’s the same thing. The problem with that is, anyone can walk out at anytime. How does that make a marriage different? In a marriage you’re ready to be held accountable for walking out on the person you vowed to take care of in front of witnesses, on a legally stamped paper that is kept safe for records. It’s not about imprisoning a person, or their emotion. It’s about seeking out stability in the utmost sense. You’re ready to be their legal guardian and partner through thick and thin, through sickness and health, through rich and poor and through better and worse. You’re willing to make it legal. That, right there, is the highest form of commitment; not “just another piece of paper.” 

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Article from: RELATIONSHIPS, by Dessidre Fleming

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4 Signs That You’re About To Have An Affair

A one night stand, a brief fling, a night of wild, uninhibited, drink-fueled sex with a woman who is not your wife or girlfriend is one thing. Carrying on with another woman over a long period of time is quite another. The former may lead to the latter. But an affair is most likely to occur after a prolonged and subtle flirtation with a woman you know well.

It is easier than you think to get drawn into one. Whether you decide to cross the line of flirtation into actual sex is up to you, but you should not fool yourself into thinking it was something that “just happened”.

There are always signs that you are about to have an affair. Here are 4 of them.

1. You fantasize constantly about her

Most of us masturbate to different girls we see every day. Even when you are doing the wife or girlfriend, you may conjure the image of various hotties in your office or the coffee shop girls you see each afternoon. There is no real danger here. It is typical male behavior.

However, if your mind wonders very little from one particular woman, and if she is someone with whom you speak and socialize regularly, you ought to take heed; for you are on the path to an affair.

2. You encourage her to speak about her dating life

It is hard to control your instincts and impulses when you around a woman you like. One minute you may be talking about work-related issues or what’s happening in the news; a few hours and many more drinks may lead you to ask about her dating life. If she responds to the question positively, it may become a regular topic of conversation.

How does that push you closer to having an affair? It associates you with sex in her mind. If she is a serial dater, if she never seems to find the right guy, it may be a sign that it is you that she desires; and she wants you to know that.

3. She suggests having dinner with you and your significant other

If a girl you know is really into you, meeting your partner may seem like the last thing she would want. However, there are good reasons for her to make this move. It is a way of inserting herself into the most intimate part of your life. It is a stroke of boldness. It is a way of pushing herself from the margins of your life to the very center of it. And besides, meeting your partner allows her to size up the competition: it gives her a means of finding out what she can give you that your partner can’t.

4. The two of you experience awkward moments of sexual tension

A succession of awkward moments filled with sexual tension is the most definitive sign that you are on the brink of having an affair. Those breaks in conversation that are bridged over with smiles; the partings in which the hug or cheek kiss lingers a bit too long; the accidental brush up that seems to be no accident at all—these are signs that there is something going on between the two of you. What you do about it must eventually be decided. But there should be no mistake as to what is happening: you are being drawn into having an affair with another woman.
Article from: TSB Magazine | Dating and Lifestyle Advice for Men, by Christopher Reid

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How To Date A Feminist

It’s 2015, and fewer and fewer people are shying away from identifying themselves as feminists.

Beyoncé performed at last year’s VMAs in front of giant, all-caps lettering spelling out the word “FEMINIST”; Buzzfeed, an enormously popular media outlet, recently expressed unflinching support for the movement; and an increasing number of people is willing to adopt the label compared to a decade a…
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Can You Ever Stop Loving Someone?

Though the question seems out of place in a men’s magazine, I ask you, my brothers, to think seriously about it.

We are men. Testosterone drives us to hunt, to protect, to act out in all sorts of aggressive ways; it is partly responsible for the greater development of our muscle mass, the density of our bone structure, the hair on our faces and chest, and the desire to protect what is ours—to defend our hearth and home, our women and children.

The masculine chemical also makes it harder for us to form lasting and permanent attachments to mates. We can fuck anyone. From puberty onwards, we are able and more than willing to nail anything with tits and ass. But, as we all know, sex is not the same thing as love; nor is it even an outgrowth of it.

Love for a man is more than a strong feeling. It is a state, a condition, a force that changes us in ways that can be difficult to deal with. If you have ever been in love, then you probably have some sympathy with what I’m getting at.

Working hard, making sacrifices, striving and struggling against your peers and colleagues, building up your resources so that you can purchase a stake in the world are all things you’ve done to gain greater control over your life. The feeling comes naturally. You have a will and wish to assert it.

But this priority comes crashing down when you fall in love. Suddenly you find yourself out of control, in a way that is irrepressible. You are enthralled to another person; your life influenced and guided by their will; your sense of confidence, pleasure, and satisfaction determined by changes in their every whim and fancy. I don’t say that career women, who constitute the majority of our sisters, do not face similar difficulties. But the descent from absolute control to relative control is not as hard for them.

Love for a man is a kind of existential shock from which he never really recovers.

That is why I pose the question: can you ever stop loving someone? I say no. Circumstances may make it impossible for you to be together; you may have fucked up and given her good cause to leave you or the passion and affection may have been so intense and overwhelming that it became impossible to actually make a life together. Whatever it was that drove you apart, you can never really disavow and put out of your heart any woman who got close to it.

I know for certain that if any of the three women I’ve been in love with were to show up at my doorstep right now I would be powerless to resist them. I would feel the pang, the nagging sensation of desperation mixed with longing that one feels when in love. I know that they would have power over me. How far I would go to please them is hard to say. But the feeling is there; it is irrevocable, undeniable.

If you are finding it hard to get over an ex, you should perhaps view things in a different light. It may be the case that you actually love her and have been too stubborn to admit it. If that is the case, then you will not get over her. You will move on, you will meet new women and enjoy a life filled with sexual and romantic adventure. However, once you’re in love, you can never free yourself completely from the object of your affection.
Article from: TSB Magazine | Dating and Lifestyle Advice for Men, by Christopher Reid

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Why You Should Stop Being a Good Person

“You’re such a good boy, Daniel.”

“Sarah, that was a nice thing you did. You’re a sweetheart.”

Did you hear phrases like this when you were younger? If you’re a parent, have you said something similar to your child?

This form of praising starts in early childhood. Our parents, family members, and teachers innocently install it in us (as the prior generation did to them).

“Good boy/girl” praising gives children a sense of pride and approval from their parents.

This praising gets anchored into the child’s mind. Good behavior brings reward. Expressing negative emotions and unacceptable behavior (being bad) leads to punishment.

Sit Down, Sit Up Straight, and Mind Your Manners

All parents want well-behaved children. Yet, all children misbehave. The good boy/girl program is a tool parents use to inhibit misbehavior.

Although it works to a degree, as we’ll see, this belief in pure goodness hinders the individual’s psychological development into mature adulthood.

We all have a complete range of emotions and impulses — positive to negative. We each possess the capacity for love and hate, peace and anger, joy and depression.

Sure, we would prefer to experience only love, peace, and joy. But these qualities always come with their opposite. In early childhood, we lack the ability to repress this emotional energy. When parents instruct their children to be “good boys and girls” they’re forced to push down negative emotions and impulses their environment doesn’t accept.

This repression creates what analytic psychology calls a shadow. Children drag this bag of repressed emotions, qualities, and impulses behind them into adulthood.

How Good Intentions Turn into Poor Behavior

Psychology is beginning to understand the role of the unconscious mind.  

Studies show most of human behavior is unconscious. Consider what this means: we’re not aware of what’s motivating most of our actions, thoughts, and decisions.

As an example, take Kathleen Vohs’ research on money priming. If someone dropped a box of pencils as you walked by, would you help pick them up?

Vohs ran experiments to see how exposure to money (in this case, Monopoly money from the board game) affects people’s behavior. She found that when people were “primed” with Monopoly money, they picked up fewer pencils than when they weren’t exposed to money.

No way, you might exclaim. YOU might be unaware of your behavior. But I know what I’m doing and why I do it!

The human mind’s capacity for self-deception is infinite. People who believe in pure goodness are capable of the most unscrupulous evils. Outside of our awareness, our lesser qualities express themselves through our unconscious behavior.

Parents, for example, who believe they love their children unconditionally are often unaware of their repressed hatred toward them. This hatred influences the parent’s behavior and the child’s well-being.

When parents spoil their children, for instance, they encourage ego inflation and narcissistic tendencies. How many adults wrestle with these unnecessary afflictions?  

Parents and grandparents spoil their children because of unconscious guilt. They spoil not out of love, but because they fail to admit their feelings of hatred toward their children. (“I would never hate my child.”) Instead, they feel good about pleasing their children without concern for the long-term consequences of their children’s development or well-being.

It’s why the proverb says, “the road to hell is paved with good intentions.” In identifying yourself as a “good person,” you will consciously try to do only good for yourself and others. But your shadow side — all the unowned and unrecognized stuff in your psyche — finds a way of expressing itself whether you want it to or not.

The Good Person Program Always Turns Bad

Famed psychiatrist Carl Jung is often quoted saying, “I’d rather be whole than good.”

Individuals integrating their darker parts know about their “less-than-good” tendencies. They have a choice in how they respond to their environment. Those who perceive themselves to be purely “good people,” lack this choice. They often behave poorly while believing they act in the highest good.

When you ignore the feelings of hatred, for example, it often expresses itself without your awareness. You might shame someone with a quick glance of disapproval. Or, you might reject someone by avoiding eye contact. It may be subtle, but on a subconscious level, the recipient will feel the emotional message.

If you acknowledge and welcome the emotion of hatred, you can release it. Then, you can communicate with love or neutrality. If you ignore or deny the emotion, the feeling will express itself through you.

Trying to be a good person at all times is the surest route to depression and anxiety. Why? Because when we repress parts of what we are, those parts find ways to hijack our psyche. What we resist, grows stronger.

When You Free Yourself from This Belief System, This Will Happen

In letting go of the idea that you have to be a good person, you liberate yourself. Now, you can acknowledge and integrate all different aspects of yourself you previously denied. Doing so frees up a tremendous amount of creative energy you can direct towards your interests and dreams.

It can also heal your body, for the majority of our illnesses are caused by repressed emotions. Traditional Chinese Medicine and ancient Taoist practices like Qigong are built on this understanding. A few Western medical pioneers like Dr. John Sarno, author of The Mindbody Prescription, demonstrate this too.

Also, when you free yourself of this belief, your capacity to accept and forgive others will increase. As you observe your unconscious motivations, you’ll be more understanding of the behaviors of others.

The Good Person Litmus Test

The goal, as I see it, is total acceptance of yourself as you are.

In my process, I’ve found the “good person” programming to be formidable. As an only child, I was often praised, usually without merit. When I peer past all the false ideas of pure goodness, I often encounter resistance. But through continual self-reflection on my motives and behavior, I begin to see a less flattering, but more accurate reality.

To evaluate if you’re running the “good person” program, consider these questions:

1. Are you aware of the negative emotions that arise throughout the day?
2. Do you believe it’s wrong to feel hatred towards the people you love?
3. When you witness “poor behavior” in others (dishonesty, judgment, self-deception), to you acknowledge those same impulses within yourself?
4. Are you aware of frequent feelings of envy and jealousy (if you haven’t worked through them yet)?
5. Do you see yourself as a good person without accepting the darker parts of your personality?

Be honest. This is between you and you.

How to Dismantle the Good Person Program

First, realize that “I’m a good person,” is just a belief. Evaluate for yourself if this idea serves you.  

Second, if you determine this idea doesn’t serve you, let it go. It’s just an idea, a program someone gave you. It means nothing.

Third, consider installing a new belief, like, I am a whole being. I accept myself, including the darker parts. Accept that we are complex beings with opposing tensions within us. It’s okay to hate your children at times; it doesn’t mean you don’t also love them.

As Jungian Robert Johnson writes in his classic He:

“It seems that it is the purpose of evolution now to replace an image of perfection with the concept of completeness or wholeness. Perfection suggests something all pure, with no blemishes, dark spots, or questionable areas. Wholeness includes the darkness but combines it with the light elements into a totality more real and whole than any ideal.”

Fourth, watch your emotions and thoughts throughout the day, especially your the interaction with others.

To assist you with this process, mindfulness meditation is helpful. It will give you space between you and your unconscious impulses and feelings.

Shadow work exercises allow you to get to know and befriend your darker parts.

If you’re a dreamer, can you imagine a world where everyone owns his or her inner demons?  How much family tension would instantly unravel? What would happen to the divorce rate? Would there be war?

When someone asked Jung if World War III was inevitable, he said, “Such a war could only be avoided if a sufficient number of individuals could hold the opposites together within themselves.”

Article from: Relationships & Love – Psych Central, by Scott Jeffrey

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How To Become A 21st Century Autodidact

Go to college! Get an education!

The above sentiments are commonly found in company with one another. In the present age, pursuing a university degree is bound up with the enrichment of mind. We have taken a curious turn in the last half century. The increasing access and availability of post-secondary schooling has made going through it a necessary condition of being considered educated. The meritocracy that we are constantly told about has little to do with merit in the sense of intellectual ability. It is instead a byword for those who have attained a four-year college degree.

The autodidact—the self-educated man—is no longer held in the esteem he once was. He has little prospect of advancing in business, government, or the professions. For a society that holds Abraham Lincoln and Frederick Douglass as heroes, as almost saint-like figures, we maintain a very strange attitude to the method of education largely responsible for making them what they became.

Why is the autodidact out of favor? The short answer is numbers. Society is big, its population huge. Organizations have too many people to choose from, so they must somehow narrow the field.

A college degree shows that a person is reliable enough to complete basic tasks and has the perseverance to see an undertaking through. Those who graduate from one of the higher ranking schools are viewed as being able to do these things to an even greater degree.

In reality, this is not necessarily the case. In my own experience—as someone who has gone to a supposedly elite school—the only things that those who have gone through such a system share are ambition, drive, confidence, and skill in networking. The development of intellect—the power and quality of mind that allows one to think, speak, and write clearly, coherently, and logically—is not a guaranteed result of graduating from a university.

It is nevertheless futile to resist the conditions and circumstances of modern society. That is why I believe a modification of what it means to be an autodidact is necessary.

You should pursue a four-year degree. You must possess this paper if you are to get anywhere in the world. Think of it as a union card, a way of showing the powers that be that you belong to the club.

When it comes to a genuine improvement of mind, only your initiative will do. Going to college is an opportunity to throw yourself into ideas, debate, and conversation. You must view lectures and reading lists as so many scattered elements of a foundation that will constitute your true education.

Self-education is the only true education. Wide and constant reading of books, the sorting and analysis of ideas, and the testing and evaluation of arguments, both yours and those put forward by others, is the only real path to a well-formed mind.

What does all this mean in practical terms?

It means discerning the basic categories of thought and drawing up a reading list consisting of the best that has ever been written in them. Literature, history, philosophy, science, and politics—no matter your major, find out the ancient and modern classics in each of these categories and start reading them.

This is of course a life-long project. It cannot end once you’ve completed your degree. Committing yourself to an open-ended project of reading and learning about the world after you have finished your college degree will make you a 21st century autodidact.

Article from: TSB Magazine | Dating and Lifestyle Advice for Men, by Christopher Reid

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Q&A with J: “What Are the 7 Erogenous Zones?”

This was such an intriguing reader question, I just had to answer it.

Hey there  I have a question and thought since you’re so knowledgeable you could help. There’s a friends episode where Monica teaches chandler about the 7 basic erogenous zones. If you haven’t seen it just google. My question is….what are those 7 zones?!

When Friends aired, I was a fan. Unfortunately, the series got more PG-13-ish the longer it ran, so I fell off watching after a while. But I definitely remember the characters. Here’s the clip this reader refers to (and this is not a video you want your kids to watch with you):

Monica’s statement that “everybody knows the basic erogenous zones” is obviously overstated. Even the two other people in the scene didn’t know exactly what Monica was talking about.

But what are these seven erogenous zones? Wouldn’t it be nice to know?

And so the internet has pondered this question. Not only can you Google for this video, you can run a search for “Monica’s 7 erogenous zones” and several articles and chats will appear with people conjecturing which areas of the female body are the most erotic.

Ultimately, we don’t know what Monica was talking about. Because this was just a bit — a comedy bit. Maybe the writers in the room had seven places in mind, but I doubt it. Having written a few stories myself, I know that sometimes hints are more effective than complete explanations. This is an example, because this scene got people wondering what Monica sketched on that pad and talking about this episode with others. More buzz about the episode = more people watching = higher ratings.

But from all the research I’ve done about sexual arousal, and reading through some of the interesting posts on these erogenous zones, I’m willing to take my own stab at where most wives like to be touched and stimulated.

1. Hands. Do you remember the spark you felt the first time you and your husband held hands? That cozy feeling of your softer hand in his rougher one, the way his fingers intertwined with yours, and how your palms seemed extra-sensitive to his touch? So what if a bunch of years have passed — touching hands is still sexy. I’m putting them in the erogenous zone category.

Because in addition to holding hands, he can gently stroke your palms, give you a hand massage, suck on your fingers. Those are all very sensual activities, and you might want to point out that your hands are one way to your heart. Or, to get his attention, you could always say they’re a great pit stop on the way to “seven.”

2. Lips. Our lips are quite sensitive. The skin of our lips have fewer cellular layers (3-5) than face skin (up to 16 layers), and many sensory receptors are concentrated there. Moreover, when you get close enough to kiss, you also get a whiff of your beloved’s pheromones, which can kick your desire into gear.

I’ve written about the importance of kissing several times, but here’s one post to get you thinking about this erogenous zone: You’re Not Kissing Enough

3. Neck. I’d like to provide scientific data on why touching and kissing the neck is so sexy. But honestly, this one is based on hearing from so many women that they like it. And frankly, it’s part of many book and movie romance scenes, and if this practice didn’t appeal to women, it wouldn’t be.

One theory is that the neck is both sensitive to touch, but also a rather private area. After all, whom do you let touch your neck? So exposing it to your beloved feels both vulnerable and arousing. Now some wives are too ticklish there, but plenty of gals enjoy a husband working his way up or down her neck with his lips.

4. Breasts. How you like them handled depends on you, but most wives enjoy being aroused through their breasts. You might enjoy your whole breast being held, massaged, or squeezed, or you might prefer total concentration on your nipples. Wives vary in sensitivity, so let your husband know what you enjoy.

It might change as stimulation increases, meaning you want him to start gently but desire greater pressure as you get more and more turned on. But very few women don’t enjoy something in this area. (Breastfeeding moms, you get a pass on this one if it bothers you right now.) Our breasts are pretty erogenous.

5. Vulva. Vulva is a catch-all term for the external female genitalia. It includes your vaginal lips (labia), clitoris, vaginal opening, and more. I’m going to remove clitoris from this list, because it deserves its own section. But the other parts are sensitive to varying degrees and can be aroused with manual or oral contact. In particular, the labia and vaginal opening are sensitive.

Your husband probably doesn’t understand that you’d like him to spend a little more time here, getting your engine revving and your juices flowing. It’s all so close to the part he really wants to be in that the vulva can get short shrift at times. Ask him to massage or lick your labia, tease your vaginal opening, and generally explore down there for what feels good.

6. Vagina. I suspect most husbands think this is Erogenous Zone #1. And it’s certainly in the running. When you’re highly aroused, having your husband penetrate your vagina is an incredibly satisfying feeling. Even before then, many wives enjoy digital penetration (his finger inside) to get them going.

God uniquely created vagina to receive your husband’s penis, and you can experience many amazing sensations there, using various positions and angles. He might even make contact with your Skene’s glands or G-spot. It’s a wonderfully erogenous area, and nothing feels quite like intercourse.

7. Clitoris. After some consideration, however, I decided this was “seven.” Because if you want to have an orgasm, you need direct or indirect stimulation of your clitoris. You can get indirect stimulation through intercourse, but intercourse isn’t guaranteed to produce that orgasm. Direct contact is an easier way to achieve climax.

But it has to be the right kind of stimulation. As Monica said, some guys hit the early zones, then “go to seven and set up camp.” Yet it’s unlikely to feel good if your husband kisses you a couple of times, then starts in on your clitoris. Stimulation there is going to feel much better when your lubrication is sufficient and your clitoris begins to swell. Guide your husband to give this erogenous zone the attention it desires and enjoys.

Are those really the seven erogenous zones?

No. They’re my suggestions. My online research proposed several other possibilities: scalp and hair, ears and ear lobes, stomach, buttocks, behind the knees, feet and toes.

Which should remind us that God created us differently. I give a lot of how-to tips here on my blog, but you have to try things out and see what gets you — and your husband — going. Your seven erogenous zones may not be the same seven erogenous zones as other women.

And, to confuse things even more, your seven erogenous zones could change! Because our bodies change throughout life. What felt good before you had kids might not feel as good after, or what felt good when your body was 25 years old might not feel the same when you’re 52 years old.

So here’s my advice: Treat your whole body as a potential erogenous zone. Yes, you’ll immediately be able to knock certain locations out of the running (“You want to kiss my armpit? I don’t think so!”), but you might be surprised to discover what turns you on.

Also, what turns your husband on. Maybe licking the skin behind his ear drives him utterly wild. Or he adores you squeezing his bum.

That’s the beauty of sex in marriage — you have time and a safe space to explore. Take your time and enjoy the discovery of all the erogenous zones you can find!
Article from: Hot, Holy & Humorous, by J

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When Your Best Friend Ignores You: The Why and the Ways to Fix It

If your BFF has suddenly turned cold and distant, you need to find out why. So, here’s what to do when your best friend ignores you.

A best friend is hard to find. That’s why you’ve put so much time and effort into maintaining your friendships. You and your best friend have weathered the roughest storms. From bad breakups and family disasters, to hysterical late night rants. Your best friend is the one person you could have fun waiting in a two-hour line with. It is for all of these reasons that it becomes especially hurtful when your best friend ignores you.

Going ignored by someone who’s supposed to have your back feels like a whole new level of betrayal, especially if you have no idea what you’ve done wrong.

Feelings lost about your BFF’s sudden cold shoulder? Here’s what to do when your best friend ignores you, and all of your emails, texts, phone calls, and not-so-subtle afternoon pop-ins.

The 4 G’s to finding out why… when your best friend ignores you

Any good detective knows that the first step to deciphering why your best friend is suddenly flying under the radar with you is to find out what’s wrong. This becomes increasingly difficult when they won’t respond to any of your texts or calls.

Luckily for you, it isn’t going to be that hard to figure out. When your best friend ignores you, it often has to do with the “4 G’s.” [Read: What to do when your relationship ends without warning]

#1 Guilt. If your best friend isn’t talking to you anymore, they could be suffering from a guilty conscience. Think back: when did they first start acting strangely toward you? Was it after you asked your best bro to drive your girlfriend home? If so, who’s to say a little hanky-panky wasn’t had in the car? He may be ducking you to avoid revealing a bad deed.

Your best friend may like your mate, have cheated with your mate, might be lying to you about something important, or is in some way keeping something from you that is causing them to harbor a guilty conscience. In that case, it’s best to ask around and see if your mutual friends know what might be up.

#2 Growing up. Best friends for life! Right? Wrong! Sometimes besties just grow up and grow apart. Maybe you’re married with kids, and your BFF is still living the single life. They may feel like they have nothing in common with you anymore. [Read: 14 signs your best friend isn’t your best friend anymore]

You may have different goals or understandings of things. In the end, friends break up for much the same reasons relationships do: jealousy, disagreements about fundamental ideas, lack of respect, and boredom.

Growing apart is natural, especially if you have been friends since you were very young. Puberty, high school, college years, and the endless pursuit of love tend to bond us to our BFFs.

It seems to be when we accomplish our goals of meeting our forever-mate and getting an ideal job that our friendship seems to take a hit. After all, there is no more need for guidance, company from loneliness, or confirmation of a life direction. [Read: Are you losing a friend or are you two just drifting away?]

#3 Getting laid. The facts are sad but true: we usually drop our friends when we get into serious relationships. Getting laid usually outweighs hanging out on your friend’s couch. Sorry. The treatment is hardly fair, but baby, that’s life. Don’t act like you’ve never done it!

If your friend is in a new relationship and starts ignoring you, just roll your eyes and continue on with life. Odds are they’ll come back around once the puppy-love phase settles down, or when the relationship ends.

If it continues on longer than a month, it could be that they’re significant other isn’t comfortable with your friendship. This possibility increases tenfold if you are her ex, professed a crush on them at some point in time, or are the opposite sex/could be attracted to them. [Read: How to make new friends as an adult – 15 ways to do it right]

#4 Going through trials. Your friend may be ignoring you in lieu of a much bigger problem they’re having. Don’t think this couldn’t be true just because your BFF normally shared everything with you.

So, when your best friend ignores you, it may be a sign that they’re going through an enormous trial and they don’t know how to reach out. Or maybe they’re not ready to talk about it yet.

Your BFF may be going through a monumental trial such dealing with a serious illness, caring for a sick family member, a death in the family, loss of employment, divorce, issues with sexual identity, or issues with their children. The list goes on and on. [Read: How to meet new people – 16 exciting ways to find a new crowd]

What to do when your Best Friend ignores you

Now that you know the potential reasons why your best friend isn’t talking to you, it’s time to start taking action. If you want to salvage the best friendship you’ve ever had, then we suggest these foolproof ideas:

#1 Talk it out. This is hard to do when your best friend is, well, ignoring you. But, try your best to get into contact with your BFF with a clear message: I want to understand what’s wrong. Try and find them on Skype, Facebook, Instagram, text, email, or by phone.

But whatever you do, don’t try every option. This will make you look like a stalker psychopath – not something you want your, already annoyed, BFF to deal with. [Read: 18 insightful reasons why you don’t have any friends]

#2 Set things right… AKA… apologize. One giant reason your friend might be ducking you is because they’re mad at you. Look back and try to identify what you might have done to put them off of your friendship.

Did you confess your love for them? Tell them a harsh truth? Say something you didn’t mean? Tell them you don’t like their mate? Any of these actions may warrant an angry or confused best friend. The best thing to do is to apologize and assure your friend you’ll give them the space they need.

#3 Be a better friend. How good of a friend are you? A couple years back, you once thought of your best friend as the PB to your jelly, but… how much of that still stands? It could be your friendship isn’t as give and take as you might have thought.

Maybe you often say thoughtless or offensive things. Maybe your friend finds you judgmental.  As humans, we always need to self-examine ourselves and refine our personalities to be the best we can be. That includes when dealing with our BFF. [Read: Am I a narcissist? 10 straight questions that reveal the narcissist in you]

#4 Take a break. Just like in romantic relationships, sometimes friends just need space. Your friend may be stressed or annoyed and just wants to be alone at the moment. They may just want to hang out with other people.

Or, as mentioned before, they may have a new boyfriend/girlfriend that’s occupying their time. Either way, sometimes it’s best to just accept the random cold shoulder and wait for your friend to cool off and come back around.

#5 Examine the friendship. If your friend has been ignoring you for a while, you may want to take a step back and examine how great your friendship actually was. Sure, you had fun together and you’ve been friends for a long time, but was everything still running smoothly?

If you felt drained after hanging out, don’t like who you are when you’re around them, or feel like there is an imbalance in the ‘give and take’ aspect of your friendship, then this friendly breakup may be long overdue. [Read: How self-respect affects you and your relationship]

#6 Forget them. Usually, when your best friend ignores you, the most common reactions usually go like this: You try to contact them. You complain/guilt trip about how you never see them anymore. You get upset. You resign to your broken friendship and let it go.

If you’ve tried reaching out, apologizing, and offering your support to your friend and they still seem to be ducking you – it might be time to end this friendship. You deserve more than someone who is going to throw years of friendship down the gutter.

So put your social face on, because it’s time to go out and meet someone new.

[Read: How to get your best friend back – 11 calm steps to win them back]

It can be hard when your best friend ignores you. Try as best you can to right any wrongs that have occurred between the two of you. Be the listening ear you always have been and support your friend through any trials they’re facing. Hopefully, you’ll be back to late-night drunk calls in no time. If not? C’est la vie.

The post When Your Best Friend Ignores You: The Why and the Ways to Fix It is the original content of LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Article from: LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships, by Minot Little

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Internet Services Make Senior Singles Dating Amusing And Interesting

They say you are only as old as you feel, and maybe that is why there are so many mature men and women finding new friends and love with senior singles dating. The new millennium has made just about everything we used to do a lot easier and more exciting, particularly if it involves the internet! The technological advances made possible with a computer and internet connection have made daily activities like banking, shopping and even chatting and meeting senior singles online easy and fun to do.

Everybody using online dating services have their own motives why they pick the internet to find that special someone, and older men and women are no different. Today almost everyone has a computer at home and it just makes good sense to search senior personals, and online sites for meeting senior singles. For the older man or woman who is reentering the dating world once more, many of them may find it hard or difficult to go though those old fashioned dating rituals and using a senior dating service removes a lot of the face to face dating problems for those who may be a bit shy, or don’t do the typical first date meet up well.

Rich senior men and women may want to take advantage of a dating service that performs pre-screening, and handles the match making, so they can feel sure that the individuals they meet are not just doing so for financial gain or other reasons. One of the main reasons that so many people including senior men and women use online dating agencies is because of personal fears and uncertainty, and having a service that can help them make the dating environment more relaxed and comfortable is well worth the service fee they pay.

Senior personals are like online social classifieds, there is surely something for everyone who uses them, from finding new people to chat with online, exploring new and interesting things to do with new friends, even those searching for a romantic connection, and everything in between. Some senior men and women may just start chatting with someone they met, only to find they have become attracted to that new person, making it easier to move ahead to a more romantic relationship.

Everyone wants somebody to care about, and who on the other hand cares about them, and at times those more usual dating and meeting rituals just don’t work, and that is why even seniors are finding true love and happiness online.

If you want to meet seniors online then you should learn more about senior online dating

by Kalai “N” Koyil

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