Q&A on Saving a Relationship

If you are fretting that your relationship is falling apart at the seams and you guys might break up, than you should continue reading some of my personal answers to common questions asked about saving a relationship.

Q: Where do I start in saving my relationship?

A: The first thing you need to do is to confirm to yourself that this relationship is worth saving. Your situation might be different, but in most cases, relationships falling apart have someone or both people taking the relationship for granted. Neglecting to take the time to say “I love you” or show affection can be start of your problems.

Q: How can I mend my troubled relationship.

A:Blaming each other is just going to make things worst. Knowing that you control your own actions can help you save your relationship. You will need to look deep within you and ask yourself these hard questions. Think about what you have done to make the relationship the way it is, if you want to improve your relationship, you need first improve yourself. Realistically, you can’t expect someone to change for you.

Q: What can I do to change my boyfriend?

A: From what you’ve read earlier, you can’t expect anyone to change for you. You should love all of him or not at all. In today’s times, people are led to believe that everything should be divided equally. Equally dividing the chores, planning dates, money, etc.. This would be ideal in a business relationship but could be really damaging to a romantic relationship. When it comes to saving a strained relationship, you need to give unconditional love no matter what he does or doesn’t do.

Q: What actions can I take to fix the relationship if it is already damaged?

A: You should already know what not to do if you know why your relationship is fraying at the seams. You need to watch what you can say or do to cause a fight and stop yourself from doing those things. With practice, it will be easier to catch yourself before you do something that can damage your relationship more. If it’s not worth another argument, you should let the issue roll off your back like water.

Q: How else can I fix our broken relationship?

A: Let your partner know that you are willing to do what it takes to help save your relationship. Just betruthful and apologize for all the things you have done to cause your relationship to be damaged. Don’t be try to explain your actions or be smug about it. Be prepared for whatever may happen and be honest with your feelings. Make sure he knows you are doing you best to improve the situation because you love him. He might also say he is sorry but that is not the point. Being sincere and apologetic will show him you are committed to fixing the relationship.

It will take time to fix the hurt in your relationship and change how you approach things. Saving the relationship will be simpler if you guys are honest and committed to each other.

If you enjoyed this article, also check out Advice on how to Save a Relationship and My Personal Secrets for Making a Relationship Work.

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The Best Senior Dating Online Tips

Dating can be a nerve-racking experience for any person, but for the over-fifty senior dating can be especially overwhelming. If you fit this category and are nervous at the prospect of dating again, with a few simple tips it is easy to get back into the world of dating and to embrace and make use of modern technology to do this. After all, a mature person is both older and wiser and knows enough about themselves to know what type of person they can eventually find happiness with. Why not look for this in the comfort of your own home and at your own pace? This is just one of the many things online dating can offer to the more experienced generation.

Firstly, senior dating does not have to be frightening .With the modern convenience of the internet, mature people can browse profiles on online dating sites and choose who they wish to converse with. This can be a lot less uncomfortable than entering a room full of strangers and striking up a conversation with one. Online dating sites allow for users to be able to see what a possible suitor’s likes and dislikes are before they make contact, which can help to narrow down the search immediately.

Online dating sites are readily available for seniors and for senior dating to provide a place where you can socialize and get to know other singleton seniors that are looking to date and make friends. These sites usually need you to fill in a form and give some personal information as well as dating preferences, but it is up to the user how much information they wish to submit onto their profile. The site can then begin to match the user with others looking for love, senior dating has never been easier!

Some aspects of senior dating present issues that perhaps weren’t relevant in a person’s younger years, mature daters may find that after the loss of a previous partner that they are still seeking out that companionship and online dating can also help with this situation. Online users can find out prior to meeting each other their situation and what they are looking for directly, whether it is a romance through to simply finding a friend. Finding someone who can relate to you and understand that being older doesn’t mean living any less can be very important when seeking a partner.

So, in order to embrace today’s technology and find a partner here are some ideas to optimize online senior dating:

1. Do not lie on your profile about your age etc; deceiving people lowers your chances of finding a good match!
2. Think about what you wish to find in a partner and what you want so you can be clear.
3. Upload a good photo of yourself. Senior dating can benefit greatly from this.
4. Be both realistic and patient with online dating, it may take some time.
5. Be open-minded about new modern dating techniques.
6. Enjoy socializing and getting to know other people.

Following these simple ideas should help to enhance the online user’s senior dating experience and help find the friendship or romance that they may be looking for. Dating has now evolved in modern times and those that are more mature should be able to enjoy meeting people online and allowing themselves to meet potential partners. Online dating is now seen as a respectable and useful way of finding these relationships and there is no reason why the more mature cannot get involved in this.

Shaun Parker is a relationship specialist with many years of experience in the online dating scene. Find out more about senior dating at http://www.graydate.com

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How to Get a Great Response From Your Senior Dating Ad!

Submitting a dating ad on many senior dating sites is usually free; however, it shouldn’t be done off the cuff.

Favorable online senior dating starts with the first time someone views your profile. It’s the most important time in online senior dating.

Each ad should be well thought out and emulate just what you are seeking. Be sincere. Don’t lie to the other mature single members of the senior dating site and pretend that you are someone that you are not, because someone searching for who you really will miss you! This wastes your time and everyone else’s.

A picture is worth a thousand words.

The ads of seniors who submit photographys get on average 12 times the searches of those without photographs. You do not have to submit a picture with your ad, but it might be worth considering. At www.NRNdating.com, we give single seniors or those looking for over 50 dating, the chance to upload several large images and one preview image with your ad.

When you receive a counter to your ad, it is either going to spark your interest, or not interest you at all. Even if the e-mail doesn’t light your fire, it is always polite to send a response, even if it is to say “Thanks, but no thanks.” After all, this mature single was curious enough in you to send you an email, so take it as a compliment and write back an acknowledgement that the email was accepted. If the message does light your fire, then respond to it and enjoy!

Responding To An Ad When Using A Senior Online Dating Service

When you are searching a single seniors database, you need to realize that not all seniors will be responding and not all seniors will be interested in what you have to offer. So it is a great idea to respond to more than one ad at once.

Never go overboard with your first email. Unless specifically asked, don’t go into elongated tirades about what a good lover you are and what you will do with him/her/them when you meet. Announce yourself and let the other single seniors know a little bit about you. Just as someone placing in an ad should include a picture, so should you send a photograph when you respond to the ad.

Once you receive a response to your message it is time to start giving more information. This may be a good time to speak on the phone to get a better feel for the person. Then, when you feel comfortable, it is time for the encounter.

Meeting Your Over 50 Dating Match

The first meeting another single senior is a huge step. This should be fun, but also bear in mind that safety is an issue. That is why we recommend that the initial meeting be at a public place and either during the lunch hour or right after work. If things go well, you can arrange for an immediate, more personal setting, or you can arrange one at a more conducive hour and place.

Try the best in Senior Dating Online at http://ift.tt/2n1xEYS Our online senior dating site specializes in senior dating services and over 50 dating. If you’re a single senior, visit us to register for free. Live in Wisconsin? Try Wisconsin Senior Dating here.

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Narcissistic Abuse: 16 Subtle Signs a Narcissist is Abusing You

In whatever relationship, narcissistic abuse can be one of the hardest forms of abuse to endure. These 16 signs tell you if you are being abused.

Although more attention has been paid to the personality disorder termed the narcissistic personality type recently, it is not a new phenomenon. Alice Miller, a Swiss psychologist, brought the notion of narcissistic abuse as far back as the early 1980s.

The first psychoanalyst to break from the pack, she proposed a theory that trauma need not come only in the form of violence or sexual abuse. She asserted there was a fundamental way to abuse children through a parent’s behaviors and indifference toward a child.

Miller believed most mental illness, cultism, addiction, and crime all resulted not just from trauma as traditionally described, but from a form of longstanding emotional abuse throughout childhood.

Many who came after Miller defined the ways a narcissistic individual perpetrates abuse on those dependent on them or in a relationship with them. Narcissistic abuse happens not just in parent-child relationships, but in many adult relationships.

What is a narcissist?

A narcissist is someone who cares only for themselves. Termed after a Greek mythological character, Narcissus. The story goes that he’s so smitten with himself that he falls in love with his own reflection. That is the cornerstone of a narcissistic personality.

They are so self-absorbed that they lack the basic human trait of empathy *being able to put themselves into someone else’s shoes*. Without empathy, you are left with a person who uses everyone in their wake as a means for their own pleasure. In fact, people in a narcissist’s world only exist for the sole purpose of pleasing them. [Read: 23 secret signs of narcissism people overlook until it’s too late]

Narcissistic abuse – 16 signs you are being abused by a narcissist

The term narcissistic abuse refers to the way people can be emotionally manipulated by a narcissist, and how it adversely affects one’s self-esteem and self-worth. The worst part about being abused in an emotional manner is how you are almost completely unaware of the abuse.

The recipient of narcissistic abuse typically believes they are, at times, crazy, not deserving and not worthy of love or concern. That is exactly what the narcissist feeds off. It is by making others insecure and dependent where they find their power.

How do you know if you are a victim of narcissistic abuse? These are the 16 signs you are in a narcissistic abusive relationship. [Read: 21 big signs of emotional abuse you may be overlooking]

#1 You have low self-esteem. The victim of narcissistic abuse typically has a very low image of themselves. That is how a narcissist gains control. By making you feel less than, they control and manipulate you. Before you know it, you wake up lacking the self-worth you used to have. [Read: 10 signs of low self-esteem and 5 ways to increase it]

#2 You think you are going crazy. A narcissist makes you feel like you are going crazy. When you begin to see what is going on, they convince you that it is all in your head and that they are an innocent bystander. That is why it is so hard to leave a narcissistic abusive relationship.

The continual push-pull is one of the most difficult things to overcome. In technical terms, it is called “gas lighting.”

Gas lighting is the way narcissists intentionally make you feel as if you are crazy and making everything up in your head. They have an answer for everything or they answer nothing, to make you feel like you are going insane. [Read: Gas lighting: 16 signs your lover is messing with your mind]

#3 You become depressed or anxious. When someone treats you with disregard or to their own end, it is easy to become depressed and anxious. Feeling unworthy, invisible, and developing self-loathing, in some instances, people who are the recipient of narcissistic abuse typically exhibit depression and anxiety.

#4 Nothing you ever do is good enough. It isn’t just you. If you feel like nothing you ever do is good enough, it isn’t. It is through the constant debasement where the narcissist gains the advantage.

If they allow you to “have one,” then you gain some power. And something they don’t want. Backhanded comments, continual negativity, or complete ignorance of anything you have accomplished or done well, are all signs you are a victim of narcissistic abuse. [Read: Controlling relationship: 18 signs you’re being coerced into one]

#5 Just when you are about to leave they pull you back in. The cornerstone of narcissistic abuse is emotional manipulation. They push you to the very limit, just before you have had enough that you want to cut them from your life, and then the charm comes out. They love you when you want to leave, ignore you when you stay.

#6 Their attitude toward you changes rapidly. When you first form a relationship with a narcissist, they make you feel like you are the best thing they have ever had. They can’t adore or compliment you more. Very charming, they win your heart.

But, once you have it, they no longer want you. If you suddenly feel like the person who used to smile at you and make you feel incredible can’t be bothered with you, that is part of the abuse and emotional manipulation.

#7 The person you are with is charming when they want to be. Narcissists can be the most charming people alive. If you are in a relationship with one, you often notice they are charming to everyone but you.

Take heart, it isn’t that there is something wrong with you, or that they even care about anyone else. The way they manipulate people is through their charm. They don’t feel the need to attract you anymore because they feel as if they already have control over you. [Read: 16 real signs you’re in a narcissistic relationship]

#8 You feel ignored and invisible. The victims of narcissistic abuse often feel neglected, ignored, and invisible. Because they are. By withholding attention and love, the narcissist keeps you right where they want you, dependent on them. If they pay you any attention, you may just have the strength and the self-esteem to move on.

#9 Your partner or parent belittles and debases you. It isn’t always outward. The narcissist is very good at throwing out covert negativism or planting seeds in your head you don’t hear or even see coming. Masters of manipulation, they make sure to debase anything you do or put water on any spark of enthusiasm you have. [Read: 25 signs of covert narcissism – A special kind of mind game]

#10 They attack you with rage when you question them. The narcissist doesn’t like to be challenged or to have their own self-identity put on trial. At the slightest question of their authority or their greatness, they attack with fervor.

Rage and verbal abuse are all a way they stop people from questioning how powerful and magnificent they are. One simple question leads to a tirade.

#11 The narcissist refuses to take responsibility for anything. The narcissist convinces you that everything is your fault because they refuse to take responsibility for anything or any actions that they make. Never responsible for what they do, they project it onto someone else. Typically, it is the other person in the relationship. [Read: How to stop being insecure: 15 steps to transform your life]

#12 The narcissist uses love as blackmail. If you threaten the narcissist, they use emotional blackmail to stop feeling the threat. Blackmail comes in the form of ignoring you and withholding their love.

#13 They never acknowledge your success. Only by always being better than you can they feel powerful and steal your self-esteem. Always in competition with you, a victim of narcissistic abuse feels as if they’ve never accomplished anything good or succeeded in life.

That is by design. A part of the emotional manipulation, a narcissist makes sure they are always the top dog. They are also not above sabotaging things for you to make sure you never get ahead or succeed.

#14 Lying is not out of the ordinary. Narcissists lack in both empathy and conscience. If caught, they easily switch their story to suit their needs. Lying is a very common form of narcissistic abuse. Never knowing what is true, those being abused, have nothing to believe in. [Read: Relationship with a narcissist – What it really means to love one]

#15 When you are out of favor with them they isolate you to gain control. The best way to control someone is to be the only one in their life that they depend on. In a narcissistic abuse situation, the narcissist does all that they can to isolate their victim from friends and family members to manipulate them emotionally.

#16 They may be physically abusive. A narcissist uses emotional manipulation to control their victim, but they can also be physically abusive.

The worst part about being in a narcissistic abusive relationship is that by the time you know you are being abused, you have very little left to fight with. Breaking free from the abuse as an adult can be very difficult. Overcoming the childhood abuse can be overwhelming. [Read: How to deal with a narcissist – 13 ways to manipulate them]

The hardest part is realizing it isn’t about you. It is about a pattern of manipulation that revolves around making you feel as if it is.

[Read: 12 clear signs of a narcissist and 5 steps to break up with them]

The only way to break free and heal is by understanding that it has nothing to do with you or who you are. It isn’t your fault you can’t find love in a narcissist, after all, they are incapable of loving you.

The post Narcissistic Abuse: 16 Subtle Signs a Narcissist is Abusing You is the original content of LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Article from: LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships, by Julie Keating

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8 Things Women Observe About You In Bed That You Probably Didnt Realise

Women have observation skills. I mean this in the most intense way possible. She may never admit to that thing she saw you sneakily do that no one else saw, or that habit that you have which you probably didn’t know about yourself. But, she knows. She always knows things which don’t really need a reason to be validated. And while having sex, sure, we’re all caught up in the moment enjoying whatever it is that you’re doing to us, eyes half open, half closed, somewhere between oblivion and sensation. 

But, we’re also subconsciously making a note of the things you do to and with us while in bed. You might not even realize it; it’s like a sixth sense we have. Even I can’t explain it. And, just to give you a gist of it all, here are some of the things we observe about you while having sex.  

1. The Shape Of Your Body 

The way your muscles tighten and relax under her touch; the way your chest leads to your stomach to your pelvis to your thighs to the shape and firmness of your derriere. If we close our eyes, we can still feel every smooth, rough, bruised, burned, scarred and dimpled bend and edge on your body. 

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2. The Way You Breathe

The sound, the pace, that tiny little change in the way you breathe when you enter, or when you’re kissed or if she does something completely mind blowing with her fingers. We can tell by the way you breathe, whether or not you’re in the moment, in us, in your head, or in way over it. 

3. The Way Your Tongue Feels 

The thing with tongues is that they taste different for every person and they feel just as different. Some are coarse; some are not so coarse and some are strangely smooth (it’s a little weird but, never mind that). We notice these things. We also notice the way your tongue moves inside—the girth, the pace, the pressure, the style—every bloody thing. We notice the way your tongue responds to us and the way it takes the lead. We could fall in love with just your tongue… no kidding there. 

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4. The Way Your Fingers Work 

As well as the nimbleness of them, the shape and length, the gaps between them, whether or not she likes how you run them over her skin, the way they caress every bend and break on her body, the way the nails are shaped and whether or not they dig into our skin and whether or not you’re moving them the right way. 

5. The Weight Of Your Body 

And quite frankly, the heavier you feel on top of her, the more she loves it. It gives her the feeling that you can pin her down just with the weight of your body. She likes that in that moment, she’s so vulnerable just because of the weight you put on her. It strangely makes her feel lighter than ever, like the weight of everything and anything else doesn’t matter in that moment. She likes that you’re strong and well-built and that she can lay it all on you while you lay it all on her. Pun absolutely intended. 

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6. The Way You Taste 

Umm not just that way! Also the way your skin, your lips, your tongue, your tears (it happens, don’t cringe) and everything else that’s yours tastes. It’s like an instinctive thing for us to memorise the way you smell and taste—in the best way possible. It could be a musky, yet salty taste; or it could be masked by this freshness depending on how recently you took a shower, or sprayed a scent on your body. She takes it all in through her nose, her taste buds, her olfactory sense and her brain. 

7.  The Way You Sound 

Not just when you moan, but when you talk between gasping for breath, when you whisper softly either because you want to stay silent or because the moment requires for you to talk just enough for her to listen; the way you sound when you’re stifling the moan and when you’re responding to something she says but are actually focused more on the way she makes you feel. The way you sound when you’re smiling and we can sense it. 

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8. The Way You Look 

By look, I mean the way you look at her while you’re in the heat of the moment, the intensity of it, the solidarity of it, the emotion and the gravity of the way you look at her—she notices all of it. But, also the way you look, when you look at her. She notices it enough to subconsciously register it in her brain and be reminded of it every now and then when no one is looking, or when her eyes are closed.

Article from: RELATIONSHIPS, by Dessidre Fleming

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How to Be Happy Again: 20 Ways to Draw Happiness From Within

Sometimes life feels like a series of chores and obligations. If you want to learn how to be happy again, stop searching outside yourself and look within.

There are times in life where it is easy to get stuck in a rut. When you are there, every day seems like Groundhog Day. One morning you wake up, stop, and look around, and what you find is there isn’t really much that you find joy in or that makes you happy. If you want to know how to be happy again, it is all about retraining your brain, getting out of your funk, and thinking positive.

Happiness is not a static thing. It comes, and it goes. It is found in the small moments in life that you take in and hold with you.

20 ways to learn how to be happy again

The road to hell is paved with negativity. There is nothing that squashes someone’s happiness more than being negative in your thoughts, your anticipations, and your relationships. Like a cancer of the mind, you always expect the worst, and it leads to a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Because, no matter what reality is, all you see is negative in any experience. The key to life is whether the outcome is what you expected or not, to always find a silver lining.

If you want to know how to be happy again, it is about making these 20 simple changes that get you past your nay saying, move you closer to your goals, and make you realize that, even in the bleakest of times, there is a light shining, and you can learn how to be happy again. You may just have to look a little harder for it.

#1 Think positive. If you want to be happy again, then start thinking positively. We create our own reality. If you believe that only good things can come to you, then you perceive life in a completely different manner.

When you only think in positive terms, then there is no such thing as roadblocks or things that can get in your way. Your life’s journey is all wide-open paths to getting what you desire and what makes you happy. Thinking positive means never quitting or taking “no” for an answer. [Read: Positive vibes: 17 ways to welcome positive energy into your life]

#2 Always look for the silver lining. Even in the worst situations and outcomes, there is something positive to learn. Life is all about the experiences that we have with the world around us.

If you want to know how to be happy again, then always look for the good that comes from the journey. See all situations as fate and the way that it is supposed to be. Find the purest of joy in situations even when they don’t go how you want. That is the way to find happiness again.

#3 Take pride in small victories. Sometimes we focus solely on the big prize and negate the awesome victories along the way. For every two step forward, there may be one step back toward finding your happy place. But, the real happiness is found in each step and the incremental change that it creates in us and in our lives.

#4 Enjoy the journey. We get so fixated on the end game that we don’t stop to enjoy the excursion getting there. Life is like a road trip. It isn’t about getting to the destination alone, but the trip getting there.

Stop trying to rush through life to get to the end and relish in the time it takes, and the experiences you take with you all the way along the path. [Read: How to live in the now: 20 positive ways to live in the now]

#5 Don’t stay stuck. Nothing makes you unhappier than being stuck. The only one who keeps you stuck in a bad situation or something you don’t want to be in, is you. Even if you are in something that you don’t want to be, you always have two choices.

You can change things and make them better, or you can get out and move on. Staying stuck by not doing anything to change your circumstances is a sure-fire way to bring about unhappiness. If you want to be happy again, then only you alter things in your life to be the you, you want to be.

#6 Change those things that make you unhappy. Being happy isn’t about having everything you want, but wanting everything you have. If something is making you unhappy, then it is time to ditch it. Whatever it is, it isn’t worth holding onto or having it if it makes you unhappy.

If you want to know how to be happy again, it is about letting go of those things that don’t make you happy and finding those things that do.

#7 Dream again. If you are asking yourself how to be happy again, then you recognize that there was a time in the past when you were happy. Likely, somewhere along the way, you either forgot what the goal was or lost your dreams.

Dreams are the things that keep us going, make us feel alive, and give us hope that things can and will be what we want, if we hold on and make the best of things. If you have stopped dreaming, it is time to remember what your dreams were and start shooting for them again.

#8 Get rid of toxic relationships and friendships. Toxic relationships or friends are the biggest happiness killers that there are. The best way to be happy again is to ditch that person who is a negative force in your life or let go of the relationship dragging you down and making you unhappy.

There are times when two people just aren’t meant for each other and are nothing but toxic. It is okay to let go. Sometimes you must turn people loose, if they stand in the way of you being happy. [Read: How to recognize and end toxic relationships]

#9 Be present. Being happy means being present in your own life. That means not just going through the motions, but feeling all the emotions. If you want to find your happiness again, it might just be about taking the time to stop and look around and enjoying the little moments instead of letting them pass you by because you are continually on autopilot.

#10 Get your priorities in line. When you have your priorities all messed up, it is easy to become unhappy. Focusing your efforts or all your energy on the wrong things leaves you feeling empty and falling short.

If you want to be happy, then it might be time to look at where your priorities lie and find out if you are working toward what makes you happy or what you think others want. Prioritize what is important to you and make your happiness your number one goal

#11 Stop trying to control everything. Life is not to be controlled. It is wild and unpredictable, scary and overwhelming, and sad and happy, all at the same time. Unhappiness comes when you try too hard to control your life and what happens in it. Always thinking with your head and trying to anticipate outcomes leaves you feeling out of control and helpless. Those are two feelings that never lead to your happiness.

To find happiness, stop trying to control things and just let them come as they do. You can’t change everything. So, instead of fighting against life, work with it to get what you want and to find your happy place. [Read: 20 glaring signs you have a control freak in you]

#12 Stop comparing what you have to others. If you always look at what other people have that you don’t, then you won’t ever recognize your blessings. There is always going to be someone who appears to have more than you do, be happier than you are, and outwardly appear to have it all.

But, the truth is, you have everything you need inside of you to be happy. Stop comparing yourself to others or trying to live up to what they have, and be grateful for the things that you have.

#13 Give back. Giving back and volunteering for those around you who need help is a sure way to find happiness. It isn’t just that you recognize that people are much worse off than you, it just makes you feel good inside to help those less fortunate than you.

#14 Recognize your blessings. Everyone has been given blessings in life. Sure, some people have had a hard road or lost more things than others. But, if you have loved then you are blessed. Try to look at all the things you do have and forget about the things that you think are missing.

#15 Do what makes you happy. Taking time to do the things that make you happy are important. It is easy to get caught up and stop doing those things that make you happy. Life is too short to live it never doing what you want. If you want to find happiness, then find those moments and experiences that bring out your happy side. [Read: How to cheer yourself up: 21 ways to find your inner happiness]

#16 Make time for you. Stop living for everyone else and live for yourself. If you find you always have a little extra time to help everyone but never have alone time to make yourself happy, then start putting your own needs above others. You will find that being “selfish” is a good thing for your happiness.

#17 Learn to say no. Stop saying yes to everyone who needs you or your help. Saying yes might feel good if you are a pleaser. But, chances are that you don’t feel so happy when you would rather be doing something else. Or, you are not doing what you are supposed to because you are too busy doing things for other people. Learning to say no to others can be one of the best things to gain freedom and find happiness again.

#18 Unleash your mind. Stop thinking that things aren’t possible. Anything is possible if you set your mind to it. Think outside the box to get what you want and never convince yourself out of something. Go all in to get what you want and to make yourself happy.

#19 Unplug. Happiness is not found on a computer screen. It is found in the faces of those you love. If you want to find happiness, stop building a life and friendships on Facebook and create a real life and connections around you. Put your electronics away and start living in this world, that is the best way to learn how to be happy again. [Read: Sabotaging your happiness: 12 ways you can ruin your life]

#20 Exercise. Exercise helps you chase away any feelings of depression or moodiness that may be keeping you stuck unhappy. Keeping physically strong contributes to keeping you the same mentally. Healthy goes hand-in-hand with happiness, so hit the great outdoors, or the gym, to find your smiley face.

[Read: How to feel happy: 13 proven strategies for instant happiness]

If you are asking how to be happy again, then you were happy at one time. That is a good thing. All you have to do is find out what changed and find your way back. Happiness doesn’t come from outside; it comes from within.

The post How to Be Happy Again: 20 Ways to Draw Happiness From Within is the original content of LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.
Article from: LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships, by Julie Keating

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Review of NeuroActiv-6 by NaturalCell

Can This Brain Health Supplement Bring You A Better Quality of Life?

Neuroactiv-6 first caught my attention because it has a unique set of benefits. This supplement’s ingredients promise to improve brain function, reduce stress and reverse the effects of aging on the mind.

The main reason that I chose to try this instead of some other supplement: all the benefits Neuroactiv-6 promises are related to quality of life. A lot of supplements get caught up in side benefits, and they lose sight of the ultimate goal for everyone who buys these products. This one universal goal is a better quality of life.

What is Neuroactiv-6 and what does it do?

The big question with any new supplement is whether it can deliver on its promises without creating any nasty side effects. I felt at ease with Neuroactiv-6 because it is made from natural ingredients.

Neuroactiv-6 was created by a company called NaturalCell. The “natural” in its name seems fitting. A quick glance at the ingredients, which the company publishes openly on the Neuroactiv-6 web page, shows that they are, indeed, all natural.

Each ingredient is meant to provide a specific benefit. The herb Ashwagandha, for example, has been proven be research to reduce stress and enhance mood. Turmeric is a root that can aid cognitive functions, and Neuroactiv’s central ingredient, a compound called NeuroFactor, is made using the whole fruit of the coffee plant. This unique ingredient helps to reverse the loss of an essential protein called brain-derived neuropath factor, or BDNF. Clinical studies have linked lower levels of BDNF with poor brain function.

Another unfamiliar-sounding ingredient, citicoline, is actually a natural brain nutrient that studies have shown has potent anti-aging benefits.

Better mental performance

This is where the quality of life idea comes in. If the ingredients in Neuroactiv6 work like they are supposed to, and research suggests that they will, then the product bring about things like better concentration and better overall “mental performance” along with lower levels of stress and anxiety.

When you really think about it, non-optimal brain function is a problem that you want to deal with as soon as possible. Many people, myself included, go through long stretches during the day when they are operating in a kind of “mental fog.” This doesn’t mean that we are in need of psychological help or anything, it is just that we aren’t focused and have a hard time concentrating on anything. This state of mind can hurt work performance, but, more importantly, this “fog” means that we are just not getting the most enjoyment out of our life.

So, when I first picked up a bottle of Neuroactiv-6, I was hopeful that it could help end this habit of falling into a mental haze.

One month trial

I started with a one month supply. Within a week, I noticed that I was able to concentrate at work for longer periods of time. It seemed like a completely organic change: I was able to focus on a task without having to remind myself “it’s time to concentrate now.” I just did it.

About two weeks into the month, I had to deal with a major mistake in a project that I was working on with two other people. We were able to clear it up in a couple of days. It wasn’t until afterwards, during the weekend, that I realized that the whole process of fixing this problem had seemed really smooth. In the past, I would have stayed up at night worrying and sat there with a knot in my stomach, physically feeling the stress of having to redo this complicated project.

That didn’t happen this time. I was able to handle the stress and anxiety so well that I didn’t even know that I was supposed to be stressed.
By the end of the month, I was pretty convinced about Neuroactiv-6’s benefits. In a way, I felt much younger. Yes, other products can make you feel younger physically, but this one makes you feel younger mentally. The fog was indeed lifted. I was reacting to everything that happened without any anxiety, and I was doing tasks with full focus instead of muddling through them and getting distracted multiple times.

So it turns out that I was right about the prediction that Neuroactiv-6 would bring a better quality of life.

What about the quality of the product?

My final question: Does this better quality of life come from a quality product? I appreciated that NaturalCell is transparent about what ingredients and dosages are in its product. This meant that I could research effects and look at clinical studies myself instead of just trusting what they told me.

NaturalCell also has an in-house Quality Assurance Department that uses US FDA standards to not only verify that the ingredients are of high quality, but to inspect each batch of Neuroactiv-6 before it goes onto the market. This combination of transparency and quality control was reassuring.

I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend Neuroactiv-6 to anyone who wants to improve their mental performance and lower their anxiety. Because of the quality of life aspect to this product, I would say that anyone and everyone should at least give it a try for a month like I did.

Article from: TSB Magazine | Dating and Lifestyle Advice for Men, by Bobby Rio

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Discover What Your Marriage Is Missing: Your Relationship Check-up Is Long Overdue

No one can deny the benefit of preventive medicine. First of all, it’s often easier to prevent an illness than it is to cure it–that’s why you go in for your annual physical (or why you should). And we all can agree that feeling healthy is preferable to feeling sick. So looking out for potential illnesses before they take over your life is the reasoning behind the medical check-up.

But when was your last relationship check-up?

Everyone needs a Relationship Check-up…

Unfortunately, couples and couples counselors have not adopted the philosophy of the regular physical for relationships. Most often, the approach is to wait for problems to arise, persist, and then to seek help. To compound the problem, most marriage counseling is focused exclusively on the presenting complaint–this problem-centered focus often obscures any resilient aspects of a relationship that already exist, ones that might be used in a healthy way. This sends the message that couples should only seek counseling or give their relationship close attention when a crisis arises. Couples counseling is seen as a last resort, an act of desperation.

Shouldn’t there be an alternative to this approach?

The typical journey to marriage counseling:

Meet Joanna and Bernie–the “every” couple.

Like many modern-day couples who try to juggle numerous commitments and responsibilities, Joanna and Bernie have their share of stress. And this stress has taken a toll on them. Over time, their relationship has suffered.

Depending on circumstances, relationship problems surfaced but then seemed to disappear…only to resurface at some later point. As time passed, this pattern intensified and became more frequent, often with no resolution. The vitality and life that was once a part of their relationship started to give way to hurt feelings, then withdrawal and finally indifference. As their marriage became more painful, Joanna and Bernie started to channel their energies elsewhere: Work-related activities, parenting and/or time spent with family and friends supplanted the time that was once spent enjoying each other.

As unresolved issues continued to fester, the familiar relationship that once offered comfort and meaning was nowhere to be found. Beleaguered and hopeless, it became painfully obvious to Joanna and Bernie that marriage counseling was needed if they wanted to head off a divorce.

Couples often endure an agonizing existence for years before seeking help–and like a slowly developing medical problem, the more time that elapses before seeking treatment, the poorer the prognosis.

But what if Joanna and Bernie had been going for an annual relationship check-up?

Isn’t it possible that their marriage problems could have been identified early on and Joanna and Bernie been given the tools needed to tackle these issues?

Unfortunately, few options exist for couples who want to evaluate the overall health of their relationship before problems crop up.

When is a problem a “real” problem?

There is a level of decisiveness when someone is dealing with a physical aliment: if you develop a pounding headache that won’t go away, you call your doctor; when you injure your back to the point where you can hardly move, you see a specialist immediately.

This level of decisiveness is lacking when it comes to relationship aliments.

Some couples quarrel often and still have strong relationships; however, conflict can signal the start of significant trouble for others. Some couples make love infrequently but still feel fulfilled and connected with each other, while for other couples, a lack of physical intimacy is a sign that help is needed. In other words, a problem for one couple isn’t necessarily a problem for another.

Would you call a counselor for a relationship check-up if you faced any of the following?

~Lately your marriage seems less fulfilling;

~You start wondering if this is all that love has to offer;

~Over the last few months, you and your husband have been arguing more frequently;

~You’ve noticed that your wife has been withdrawing from you and avoiding intimacy;

~When you have the choice, you prefer spending time with friends rather than with your partner;

~You find that you have no desire to make love to your husband.

If you answered “no” to the above question (whether or not you’d call a professional if you faced any of the aforementioned issues), you’re not alone. And quite frankly, your marriage or relationship might be fine in spite of any one of the above concerns. But then again, one of these observations might also signal that your relationship needs some attention. This is why ongoing attention is so vital for the health of your relationship.

What a Relationship Check-up Can Do for You:

A relationship check-up should focus on all aspects of your relationship–highlighting what is working well, each person’s unique strengths, how these strengths can best be utilized in the relationship, as well as any areas that might need attention so problems can be prevented. Couples can leave a relationship check-up invigorated and with a plan of action that will help them keep their marriage or relationship moving in the right direction.

This preventive medicine approach is a healthy alternative to “just putting up with” relationship problems before seeking help.

Are you ready to implement the preventive medicine model for your relationship?

Dr. Nicastro offers a FREE relationship check-up. Visit http://ift.tt/2mxDW2j and you can also sign up for Dr. Nicastro’s FREE Relationship Toolbox Newsletter. As a bonus, you will receive two free relationship reports.

Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. is a relationship and intimacy coach.

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7 Winning First Date Secrets for Senior Dating

You are 50 and you are still searching for your so called true love. Hate to watch your life pass you by like this… By all means, indulge in senior dating!

It’s been years or decades since your last date? Even if you wanted to return into the dating scene, you’re fearful that you have already lost your dating touch. And wondering how much the dating etiquette has had already progressed? Sit back and relax. Regain your dating prowess as you had in your teens back then. Read on to acquire these winning secrets on how to make senior dating lesser of a pressure and more of a pleasurable activity.

1. Care for a second serving? The decision to get into the scene of dating is the one of the goals in getting into a first date. And how else can you accomplish that but to plan a date that would ensure lots of conversation, right? This is the opportunity for you to get to know each other more. Senior dating is definitely no different from younger dating since the “guidelines” don’t differ that much. On a first date, it will be wise to avoid activities that will just leave you sitting mummed in the dark, i.e., watching a movie or a play. Senior dating does not spare anyone on the stress of groping in the dark if a first date became full of dead air.

2. Bringing out the best from both. It is imperative that you consider activities that you think will be of your same interest. A hobby or a shared value built into your first date will not only minimize the pressure on the two of you but will also draw out the best in you. In senior dating, regardless of how long you’ve forsaken your throne already, you will be given a head start if you do your homework. Whether you ask your date regarding what her interests or hobbies beforehand or research through common friends to surprise her with such activity. If you’re really into it, there’ll be no way of stopping you to make this first date a good one.

3. Wonderful lunch dates. Taking into consideration of senior dating and choosing lunch over dinner for some health reasons is just a loser’s thought. A first date during senior dating, just like teen dating, will be more enjoyable if done during daytime when more activities are available for the both of you to enjoy. It’s just that intimate ambience that a dinner date conjures that makes a first date more of an anxiety-inducing bustle than an easy feat.

4. If going on senior dating just put you in a nerve-wracking jumbled mood, consider the ever trusty group dates with friends. This will not only minimize the pressure of coming up with an in-synch convo but will also be more of an opportunity to see how you two interact with others. A charity auction or playing a sport that you and your group both agree to will do.

5. Rock and roll or take a stroll. No, it’s not about going to rock n’ roll concerts. Dance parties are good first date alternatives if you are not really a lunch-date person. After an exhausting boogie-ing evening, those first date stress will already be relieved by then. Taking a stroll after the dance date will give you more time to get acquainted more of each other.

6. Senior dating doesn’t mean that you have to be pressured to doing everything to the extent of straining yourself just to hit it off. How? Expand your realm of senior dating beyond those common wine tasting or book searching generic first date activities. Markets or malls are excellent for not only giving you time to gauge whether you’re of the same wavelength but may also give you an excuse if you didn’t. This is not about giving you negative vibes regarding your first date on senior dating but to prepare you for the possibilities of a not-so successful one or some kind of a way of getting a glimpse of the worst scenario.

7. Choose: graceful or not. First dates often meant not necessarily be knowing the person that much. If ever something comes up or simply you felt that you’re not comfortable with your date, leave. It’s better to be safe than be sorry.

Don’t just keep on telling yourself that you’ve been there and done that. Just keep an open mind and remember that you’re involving yourself with senior dating to have a good time. The first date is not an exception. Therefore, use these senior dating secrets whenever you can.

Brian Lam is an author of many articles and you can get free dating tips at his Speed Seduction Tips where he will show you many different proven and practical dating tips that you can use instantly in your real life today. Grab these Free Speed Seduction Tips now.

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35 Really Important Questions to Ask a Girl You Just Met

So, you finally met the girl of your dreams… well, maybe. But how do you know if she’s the ONE? Here are some questions to ask a girl you just met.

It’s always exciting to meet new people, especially hot girls that you either want to date or maybe even marry some day! Okay, let’s not get ahead of ourselves with the marriage thing quite yet. Because you just met her.

But you know you like her, and you don’t want to blow it. Not every guy is good at making conversation with a girl he likes, so I’m here to help you.

35 important questions to ask a girl you just met

It’s really important to ask the right questions when you first meet someone – and even after you start dating them. Knowing some of these things will help you understand whether or not you two are compatible. And the sooner you know, the better.

These questions to ask a girl you just met range from silly to serious, but they will all give you a clue as to whether or not you want to keep pursuing her. [Read: Things to talk about with a girl – 43 perfect conversation starters]

#1 Where are you from? Simple, direct, and mostly just a ritual when you first meet someone.

#2 What do you do for a living? This will let you know a lot about her passions and what she wants to contribute to the world.

#3 What do you love about your job? Many people hate their job and love to complain. So is she positive or negative about it?

#4 Do you consider yourself an introvert or extrovert? If you’re a raging party animal/extrovert and she’s a shy book work, yeah, that might not work.

#5 What’s your dream? Does she even have dreams? Hopefully she does.

[Read: Instant chemistry – 25 flirty questions to ask a girl you like]

#6 Do you have any siblings? This might give you some insight into her personality if you can find out where she is in the birth order.

#7 Are you close to your parents? It might be a red flag if she’s not close to them, although the reasons why can vary wildly.

#8 What’s your favorite kind of food? Is she a super picky eater? Or adventurous? How does it compare to you?

#9 What do you do for fun? If you like to hike and go skydiving, but she’s not a nature lover or risk taker… well… you get my point.

#10 Do you like concerts? This will give you an insight about the kind of music she likes, or if she even likes concerts at all.

[Read: Make her horny – 24 sexual questions to ask a girl over text]

#11 Would you ever go skydiving? This is a biggie! People who would go skydiving are very different than those who wouldn’t.

#12 If you could trade places with anyone in the world, who would it be and why? This gives you a clue as to whether she’s happy with her life or not.

#13 What was your first impression of me? Well, this will tell you whether or not you have any chance with her at all.

#14 What do you look for in a guy you date? You can de-personalize this one and not ask about yourself specifically… so you don’t look needy.

#15 What was your longest relationship? If you’re just looking for a hookup, but she’s only a long-term relationship gal, then you might be out of luck.

[Read: 40 questions to ask your crush to subtly flirt with them]

#16 What’s the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for you? Take careful notes on this one so that you can do something romantic for her later on.

#17 What’s the most fun thing to do in this city? If you’re not native to the city you’re in, then see what kind of ideas she has for fun.

#18 If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why? Would she still live here? If not, why would she leave?

#19 Would you ever want to be famous? This might give you a clue about whether or not she has some narcissistic tendencies or if she really likes a lot of attention.

#20 If you would like to be famous, what would you want to be known for? It would be very different if she compared herself to Oprah than if she said she wanted to be like Kim Kardashian.

[Read: 20 deep questions to ask a girl to have her reveal her true self]

#21 Who do you admire most? Most people say their parents, but hopefully she gives a more creative answer. Don’t forget to ask her why.

#22 If you could have dinner with anyone – dead or alive – who would it be and why? She could say anything from God to Cleopatra.

#23 Do you have a best friend? If she doesn’t have a lot of friends, that says something about her. Conversely, if she has a zillion, maybe she won’t have time for you.

#24 How old are you? One of the basics, but you need to be careful with this one if she is older because she might be sensitive about her age.

#25 When is your birthday? This is better than asking her what her sign is… because that’s just downright cheesy.

[Read: 36 racy, random, funny questions for flirty guys and girls]

#26 Do you have any hobbies? Does she like to knit? Is she a marathon runner? Is she in a band?

#27 Who has had the most influence on you? It’s probably even more important to ask her why and how this person had so much influence on her.

#28 Are you looking for a relationship? This is a pretty important one. Too many times, one person wants a hookup and the other wants a relationship. Get on the same page right away.

#29 If you won the lottery, what would you do with all the money? Would she donate it to charity and feed the homeless? Or blow it on new shoes, cars, and houses?

#30 If you had 3 wishes, what would they be? This question will give you a clue as to what is missing in her life.

[Read: 20 funny questions to ask a girl and leave her ROFL]

#31 What’s your biggest pet peeve? Pay close attention to this one so that you can avoid doing whatever bugs her.

#32 If you were stranded on a desert island, what 3 things would you want/need with you? If she says a person, it shows she’s sensitive. If she says beer, then she’s a partier.

#33 Do you have a celebrity crush? Well, you may not want to know this one just in case she asks you for a “free pass” someday.

#34 Do you like reading? Is she an intellectual or someone who despises hitting the books?

#35 Do you believe in God? People say to stay away from this one, but if she’s an atheist and you’re a devout Christian, then it’s best to know right away.

[Read: 60 get-to-know-you questions for a potential romance]

Meeting someone new is exciting, but it can be scary too if you don’t know what to talk about. But with these questions to ask a girl you just met, it’ll be easy as pie.

The post 35 Really Important Questions to Ask a Girl You Just Met is the original content of LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.
Article from: LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships, by Dr. Carol Morgan

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Commitment: The Essential Ingredient In Your Relationship

Anyone who has run a marathon knows about commitment. To compete, the athlete relies on extensive training and physical fitness. But when the initial enthusiasm wanes and the painful, long-distance realities grip the runner’s body, it is sheer dedication–commitment to completing what she started–that sustains the runner’s motivation as she reaches for the finish line.

A relationship is a lot like running a marathon. There are highs and lows, challenges and rewards, and times when you may want to give up–when it feels too difficult to continue. What will keep you on track and moving forward when your relationship hits the inevitable rough patch? Will love be enough?

Commitment: Your relationship lifeline

Commitment is a belief in relationship permanence and the understanding that at times your union will need a life-jacket to stay afloat.

When you and your partner are committed to the relationship, the union remains more important then your (and your partner’s) individual needs. Without mutual commitment, deep trust will never take root and intimacy will wither. When one person’s commitment is tenuous, the very fabric of the relationship is weakened. A lack of commitment reduces the buffer that holds relationships together during times of conflict and stress. Imagine living with the fear that periodic slumps in your relationship can cause your partner to bail.

Trust and deep intimacy will only grow in the soil of commitment

Commitment has a dual role in your relationship. You can view commitment as the vehicle to help deepen your love, and you can also view it as a safety net of sorts, a way to protect your marriage or relationship during the difficult periods that each and every relationship experiences.

Commitment allows love and intimacy to mature over time. Someone who ends a relationship because the excitement of new love has diminished misses out on the opportunities that relationships bring for individual and mutual growth.

Some erroneously believe that a commitment like “till death do us part” means foolishly locking yourself into a life-time of potential unhappiness. No one should commit to a relationship that cannot meet their needs. Your needs (and your partner’s needs) do matter and should be part of the overall commitment equation. But life and relationships are complicated, and there will be stretches of time when your partner does not meet your needs (and you will not meet your partner’s needs). Commitment is what will get you through those rough stretches, enabling each of you to get back on track in meeting each other’s needs once again.

All couples (married and unmarried) face an enormous challenge: How to stay devoted to one another throughout the life of your relationship, even when early enthusiasm and euphoria naturally wane.

Commitment is a very personal process. Unfortunately, for some it will mean blind dedication to a union that rarely meets their needs; while others eschew commitment and impulsively use the ebb and flow of happiness as the gauge whether to stay or leave. Both of these approaches are flawed. Ideally, commitment will remain in place as happiness comes and goes and your relationship finds its footing along life’s shifting terrain.

Commitment checklist:

Commit to:

~understanding that love grows and deepens over a lifetime

~acknowledging that all relationships go through ups and downs

~continuously working toward a meaningful relationship that will transcend momentary happiness

~working through problems with your partner (while resisting the temptation to get your needs met outside of the relationship)

~finding solutions that will keep your relationship moving forward

~compromising (even when you think you’re right)

~yourself and the relationship

Don’t commit to:

~anything that feels abusive

~always sacrificing what’s most important to you

~the idea that if your relationship requires hard work it means your relationship is flawed

~the mindset that it’s acceptable for your needs to continuously go unmet

One of the greatest challenges to commitment lies in the instant-gratification mindset–the idea that you deserve to have what you want when you want it. The settings to our pleasure barometer have been altered and humans are less willing to deal with frustrating circumstances or anything that feels like it stands in the way of immediate happiness. This poses a problem for relationships.

When you make decisions about your relationship based solely on the need to feel happy (all the time), you abandon commitment and the rich opportunities that are essential for your relationship to grow.

I invite you to think about what commitment means to you. What you are committing to in your marriage or relationship?

To discover relationship tips, visit Dr. Nicastro’s website at http://ift.tt/2mxDW2j and sign up for the FREE Relationship Toolbox Newsletter.

As a bonus you will also receive two free reports.

Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. is a relationship and intimacy coach.

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Book Review: A Loving Divorce

When a couple says, “I do,” those two simple words are filled with hope, love, and devotion. There is a sense of permanency, of stability, of forever. And yet we are repeatedly faced with sobering statistics. Half of all US marriages end in divorce.

The average length of these marriages is eight years — that is a long time to intertwine one’s most intimate thoughts and feelings with another before they are torn apart. Divorce is notoriously messy, with melodramatic TV shows, books, and movies built around the heartbreak and hair-pulling of a crumbling marriage, complete with insults, acrimony, and carnage. But maybe it doesn’t always have to be that way. Maybe there can be an alternative to the animosity and loss.

In her book, A Loving Divorce: A Perspective of Compassion for All Relationships, Lynda Miles tries to walk an alternative path, one that lays the groundwork for a respectful separation that honors the needs of the individuals and allows for personal growth during what can be such a difficult time.

Miles writes from a place of painfully honest experience. When she and her husband, Brian, realized they had reached the end of their marriage, she wanted more for them than a division of assets. Rather than a reactionary parting of the ways, she decided to take a deliberate and thoughtful approach to divorce, but found herself without a blueprint. She notes, “When I was considering a loving divorce, I could find no books on the subject.” Instead, she had to find her own way.

Now, she shares with us what she learned from the experience. This book, in fact, is part of that process. She writes, “The things I share are very personal, but I realize that I’m just one person; I’m not that important. Sharing deeply is important. Love, acceptance, understanding, and the possibility of helping others are important.” And while this book may be more anecdote than antidote, it provides a thoughtful exploration of ending relationships.

When Miles wanted a loving divorce, it was not an easy route. Divorce carries a heavy social burden and marriage is often held up as the pinnacle of bliss and personal success. She writes, “For starters, I had to process and let go of any possible judgments others might have about divorce. That was a tall order! My older siblings were all in lifelong marriages, and my younger siblings were also married, for at least several years. And what would my codependent mother say?” She starts by talking to people, exploring whether others have been successful in creating a loving end to their marriage, and finds compassion and support in others, married and single alike.

This book is filled with many little gems that are likely to be relevant regardless of your current relationship status. One important point Miles highlights is the need to be moving toward something rather than just away from a marriage. She writes, “This separation/divorce was the next step in our lives. For me, it was a step toward realizing wholeness and greater independence, having healthier boundaries, and becoming healthier psychologically and emotionally.”

She shares how she was able to grow through her divorce. For Miles, she was able to find security and confidence within herself. She notes, “I feel so much less limited in my life because of my ability to be happily without a partner.” And, yet, while some of this can feel excessively idyllic, Miles is honest about her own struggles, remarking, “I’ve come to the conclusion for myself, that we’re all perfectly imperfect.”

Hers is a message of acceptance and understanding, both of herself and those around her. She notes, “This idea of being perfectly imperfect has helped me with self-acceptance, which has helped me to better accept others. We so often treat people the way we treat ourselves — and by cultivating more self-love, we can better love those around us.” This is good advice for all of us.

Although A Loving Divorce can feel a bit saccharine at times, there is a certain genuineness and self-reflection that allows Miles to pull this off. Miles has an approachable style that is easy to read. While this book is unlikely to turn around an acrimonious divorce, the ideas Miles shares may be helpful to a wide range of relationships.

A Loving Divorce: A Perspective of Compassion for All Relationships
Moksha Books, March 2016
Paperback, 125 pages
$ 12.95

Article from: Relationships & Love – Psych Central, by Megan Riddle

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Single Parent Survey now up for next Love Factually book!

Wise Readers~

Did you know?  Over 25% of American children are being raised by at least one parent who is not partnered.  But even though single parenting is common, when it comes to dating they’re all too often given the same advice and resources as non-parents.  If you are, have been, or were raised by a single parent, you know that dating after children is simply not the same.

This survey is for everyone who is a single parent looking for love; has been in that situation; or who was raised by one or more parents in that situation.  

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Your anonymous answers will be used to shape the first science-based book to take single parents through every phase of dating, making sure it includes what you want to know, and incorporates experiences important to you.   Dr. Duana Welch—relationship science expert/author/coach and former single mom—is currently writing this book.  As with her first book Love Factually, this one will use science to address every stage of dating; but this one will specifically cover issues and topics relevant to finding and keeping love for single parents.  

Thank you very much for your wisdom and help, and for sharing this with others.

 

Article from: Love Science-relationship advice, by

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Senior Dating Online Offers You Opportunities You’ve Never Had

Senior Internet dating is “in” nowadays. There are sites that are made for senior singles who love to date and make new friends, even in their prime years. They are commended for people who are still single, or may have only recently been separated. You can date online just for fun, or you can also do that if you are seriously looking for a partner or a companion.

The advent of the online dating made everything more convenient. In this day and age, almost everything that you need can be found online. Dating has made surfing the internet a lot more exciting and worthwhile. You have the whole world at your fingertips, and everyone is just a few mouse clicks away.

Most of the time though, most senior singles believe that such activities are just for younger people. Wrong! Senior singles have a massive benefit of meeting new friends and finding romance on the internet. Going on dates or engaging in a romantic relationship when you are already 50 or above does not mean you are running out of time. Sometimes, it may mean that you are just after finding the perfect match for yourself.

Finding a new partner doesn’t need any secret methods all you need to do is be yourself. You just need to keep everything real like you would in normal life. Remember that in Over 50 internet dating, the first part of a new relationship is to get to know the other person better. Therefore, it is quite important to be honest about who and what you are.

Most of the singles who get into senior internet dating have gotten over the teenage ways and perception of dates. Most senior singles are now looking for the best person that they can enjoy themselves with.

Most members of these dating sites are either widows, widowers or divorced; while the rest are still 100% single. They are singles who already know what they want and what works for them because experience had made them realized that.

Senior online dating services are easily found online. All you need to do is read a few senior dating reviews and you’ll soon realize what the most in demand dating services are where all senior singles are enjoying meeting each other. All of the dating services let you try them for free first. This is so you can really see if meeting new friends online is for you.

Just because you’re in your later years, it doesn’t’t mean it’s too late to find new romance. You have the perfect opportunity to be the happiest you’re ever been. You’re offered a lot of opportunities with senior online dating. Make the most of them and you’ll be happy again.

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Why Language Matters

Criticizing the diction, speech, syntax, and style of others is generally seen as an act of snobbery. But the state of language, especially in politics, is so alarming that anyone who cares about carrying on civilization itself should feel no shame in wearing the mantle.

We are constantly told that language is an organic phenomenon, that no person or group owns it, that it must be allowed to grow and adjust to the conditions of the time; that words take on new meanings; that new patterns emerge in written and oral usage; and that to resist such transformations is to be at best a sentimentalist and at worst an elitist.

I do not object to the premise of this argument. Language is organic. We neither spell nor write English today as people did in the time of Shakespeare. I do not propose to work against the slow metamorphoses of the English language; only to make an argument for why, whatever its emerging grammar, logic, and vocabulary, it ought to be used to make thought clear, coherent, exact, interesting, and vivid.

It is the death of good English usage that I deplore, not the subtle changes in the language itself.

Bad habits in modern English have the effect of lowering the general intelligence. Without our realizing it, we become stupider, less informed, and less able to both comprehend and express thought. If you are constantly bombarded with mangled grammar, misused words, and idiotic sentences, you will unconsciously begin to imitate them. That is, unless you are willing to take the trouble to detect poor English usage and understand where the writer or speaker went wrong.

Language still matters. People around the world are horrified at the spectacle that the current president is making of himself; they have indeed been horrified at the tone and tenor of the campaign that led to his election. But Trump is a symptom of a larger problem.

George Orwell in his famous essay “Politics and the English Language” spotted the germ of what is now a virulent and all-consuming disease. He wrote of English usage in his day (1946): “It becomes ugly and inaccurate because our thoughts are foolish, but the slovenliness of our language makes it easier for us to have foolish thoughts.”

This is an excellent summary of the problem. The worse we abuse the language the less able we are to use it to articulate clean and solid thought. Orwell pointed out a few of the common abuses in his day. Some of them are still around. Below I briefly describe the more prominent ones of today.

1. Dull repetition

Few politicians and talking heads actually choose words nowadays; it is the soundbite, the hackneyed phrase that they’re after. The best example of this is in Britain.

Since the EU referendum, both David Cameron and his successor Theresa May have gone on about “getting the best deal possible” from EU negotiations. Every Tory that has been interviewed has repeated this phrase. Specific aims, plans, ideas, and actions have not once been discussed. The politicians have been allowed to get away with the dull repetition “getting the best deal possible”.

Common sense and intellect cry out against this cliché. Is there anyone in British politics who would want to get the worst deal possible for the country? Would any of them go around saying that an okay deal for Britain would suffice? Of course not. Nevertheless the mindless phrase keeps getting repeated. And what is most discouraging is that members of the so-called opposition, the Labour Party, have started saying it as well.

2. Nonsensical usage

Muddying the waters is another way of describing this verbal trick. It involves knocking the sense out of words in order to neutralize their descriptive power.

Donald Trump’s designation of a well-established news organization as “fake news” is the most recent example of this linguistic ploy. By calling CNN fake news he makes it seem as though “fake news” is just something that people say: it has no real meaning, it is not a phenomenon that really exists, it is a pejorative term that anyone can use to describe journalism whose coverage they don’t like. This is the thinking behind nonsensical usage.

Irrational is also a word that is frequently turned on its head for dishonest purposes. So, for example, scientists and those supporting their work and findings are often called irrational by religious nutcases. There is, however, such a thing as irrationality. Incoherent, inconsistent, contradictory, or fantastical thought and expression fits the definition. However, you will often find people on the right dismiss as irrational anyone who points out the baselessness of their charges against the methods and concepts of science.

“Alternative facts” is another example of nonsensical usage. You can have alternative explanations, opinions, narratives, and many other things. But a fact either exists or it doesn’t exist. It is something that is either established or not established. There is no such thing as an “alternative fact”.

3. Wooly superlatives

We have a tendency nowadays to make everything the worst, the best, the happiest, the saddest, the most corrupt, etc. The president is well known for speaking in this babyish and ignorant way. Even if limited to your personal experience, you rarely have cause for using a superlative to describe an event, a person, or an action.

4. Metaphorical writing

Sports metaphors are becoming especially tiresome. In three different news outlets Donald Trump’s travel ban was described as “an unforced error”. The most irritating person I heard use it had the gall to appear as though he was the first person to say it. Metaphorical writing tends to be vague and obscure. And the use of mixed metaphors tells you all you need to know about the writer: he has no idea what he is talking about and what he is saying.

I could go on with this, but I think you get the picture. People in privileged positions in the public sphere owe you and everyone else their very best effort to communicate clear and honest thought. For the most part, they are not doing so. It is well past time that we demand more of them, that we resist their attempts to bullshit and manipulate us with vagueness, nonsense, puerility, and imprecision. Language matters. It is essential to the human heritage. And it is up to all us to keep in the highest state.

Article from: TSB Magazine | Dating and Lifestyle Advice for Men, by Christopher Reid

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Dating Goals: 10 Realistic Goals that WILL Lead You to The One

Going out with someone new is both exciting and a little scary. In order to find the one, these are the dating goals you should have with someone new.

I know it may sound silly to have dating goals but trust me when I say they can help you out in the long run. There are certain things you should be on the lookout for in a new partner. And there are certain expectations that should be met when you’re dating someone new.

If you’re just going out with people for the fun of it and you’re not concerned with finding “the one,” then this may not apply to you. However, if you’re been searching for someone to spend your life with but haven’t had success, then having some dating goals may be helpful.

Why you need to set high expectations right away

Dating is really hard. Being with someone new isn’t an easy thing to do. But one thing that makes it harder is not having expectations at all. When you don’t set expectations, you allow yourself to get caught up in something that can never work.

Therefore, you should always make sure you set high expectations right off the bat. I’m not talking about walking into a date and listing off things you need from them. I’m talking about making sure they know why you’re dating them and where you want it to go. [Read: How to manage your expectations in a new relationship]

Dating goals to have when you’re with someone new

If you’re someone who regularly sets goals, this should be no problem for you. It’ll be just like any other list of goals you make. But if you’ve always dated people at random and hoped for the best, this may be a little harder.

Everyone should have certain goals when it comes to dating someone new. You shouldn’t be dating people without having expectations of your own. And if you really want to find that special someone, these are the dating goals you should have.

#1 Date someone who respects your time. I think a lot of people don’t realize just how important this expectation is to have. Our time is limited. We shouldn’t waste it. Therefore, you should date someone who respects your time and is aware that you’re giving up a lot by dating them.

If you’re dating someone who hardly gets back to you at all or in a timely manner, they’re certainly not worth it. Find someone else who will respect the time you give them. [Read: Wasting your time and 21 other signs of a bad boyfriend]

#2 Someone who shares your core values. You don’t need to have everything in common with the person you’re with. You can enjoy different types of music and movies and still have a successful relationship. That is, so long as you have the same core values.

One of your dating goals should be to find someone who shares your deepest beliefs. These are things like religion, your morals, and the things you value most. The things that make you who you are and direct your life should be shared with the person you’ll end up spending forever with.

#3 Someone who’s in it for the same reasons. You just can’t ignore when the person you’re dating isn’t on the same page as you. Put your expectations out there right away. Tell them you want someone who’s in it for the real thing.

You’re ready to find the one and you need to make sure they want to, too. If you just date anyone and hope that they want the same things as you, you could end up really hurt. Eventually, you’ll find out they’re just looking for some fun in the bedroom. [Read: 16 signs you’re not ready for a serious relationship]

#4 Date a person who has passions. It doesn’t really matter what those passions are – so long as they’re healthy and moral. You just want someone who is passionate about something. Make one of your goals to date someone like this. It’ll help show you who they are. Since our passions speak volumes about us, this is important.

#5 Someone who’s interested in your interests. This isn’t to say that they have to have the same hobbies as you. Actually, they may not even understand a hobby of yours at all. This is more of them finding interest in the things you love and care about.

You’re likely to pick up new hobbies and interests as life goes on and you need someone who is supportive of those things. It doesn’t matter if they don’t understand them. That’s why this should be on your list of dating goals. [Read: New relationship advice to have the perfect start in love]

#6 Date someone who isn’t shallow. First of all, shallow people are a huge turn off in general. However, you definitely need to have the expectation of dating someone who isn’t shallow. You should have a goal of finding someone who cares about the deeper qualities of a person.

Because beauty on the outside is fleeting. You’re adorable and good-looking for only a short amount of time. You will age. So you want to have someone by your side who still thinks you’re amazing because of what’s underneath the surface. [Read: Why inner beauty is more important than looks]

#7 Someone who can add value to your life. One of the dating goals you definitely need to have is being with someone who adds value to your life. If you’re the only person bringing anything good into the relationship and you’re receiving nothing, it’s a recipe for disaster.

A successful relationship is a two-way street. You both need to give and take. If they’re getting way more positive things from you and you’re getting nothing in return, it just won’t work out.

#8 Someone who envisions a similar life as you. This is something that needs to be high on your list of dating goals. You should be looking for someone who has the same vision of what a happy life looks like. If you two disagree on this, you’ll never be able to actually live a happy life with them without being unhappy about certain things. [Read: 50 fun relationship questions to test your compatibility instantly]

#9 A person you can laugh easily with. Life can get really tough and you will be faced with hard times. You need to find someone who can make you laugh and who you can laugh easily with.

During the toughest times, you’ll need that person to help lift your spirits and that’s why you’ll want to add this to your list of dating goals.

#10 Someone you can have deep discussions with. At the same time, you also need to find someone you can get serious with. All jokes and humor won’t cut it in the real world. Your expectations need to be deeper than that. [Read: 30 deep questions to ask someone before you get in too far]

You need to be able to talk about the difficult stuff and the meaningful things in life. Finding someone who can connect with you on a deeper level and who you can actually talk about meaningful things with is crucial to finding the person to spend your life with.

 [Read: 15 real relationship goals most couples have no idea about]

There are a lot more dating goals you could have based on the things you feel are important, but these expectations are the main things you need to have in a partner in order to build a life with them.

The post Dating Goals: 10 Realistic Goals that WILL Lead You to The One is the original content of LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.
Article from: LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships, by Bella Pope

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